


Wordless Love

by nikusiatko



Category: Glee
Genre: Established Relationship, Klaine Prompt Challenge, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-16
Updated: 2015-04-01
Packaged: 2018-02-25 14:36:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 37,921
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2625374
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nikusiatko/pseuds/nikusiatko
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for Klaine prompt challenge: Kurt struggles to get the words "I love you" out as often as Blaine does. Blaine goes increasingly insecure about it until he realizes all the things Kurt does to say it in a different way.</p><p>Art by Lallagogo</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prolog

 

Blaine Anderson wasn't in the best mood. There were only a few things that made him feel utterly useless, the fear of not being loved by the ones he loved the most at the top of them all. He kind of got used to questioning his parent's love towards him over years. It didn't even hurt that much anymore. What he'd never thought he would EVER be questioning was the love of someone he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.

Blaine had been dating Kurt Hummel - the most amazing human being - for almost two years now. They were good together, and there was no doubt in Blaine's mind that Kurt was meant for him. But sometimes, truly just every now and then, Blaine was wondering whether he was meant for Kurt as well. The fact that Kurt wasn't very vocal about his love for Blaine had a hell of a lot to do with Blaine's insecurities. Although Blaine scolded himself internally every time this thought popped up in his head, he reminded himself that Kurt said those words back without missing a beat every single time Blaine confessed his love, but the nagging thoughts were coming back more often. Why did Kurt never uttered those words first? Until now, Blaine successfully managed to chase all the troublesome thoughts away. But today sucked and he was getting deeper and deeper in sorrow of his poor existence, throwing his own pity party of enormous magnitude.

Running into Kurt's ex in the morning was anything but pleasant. The guy was a prick; too confident but stupid. He did hit a nerve, though, when he asked Blaine how Kurt's abilities in expressing his feelings were. Blaine's  _It's none of your business_  made the guy snicker and he patted his shoulder with  _How long do you think will he stick around? He is probably already one foot out the door._ Blaine didn't respond to that one, he just left. He had a showcase to rehearse.

He called his parents before meeting his benefactor - June Dolloway. He wanted to make sure they would be there for his show on Friday. They had already made arrangements but Blaine needed to confirm it once again. Not the best idea. His mother announced that his father had to unexpectedly travel to the west coast for a business trip and they wouldn't be able to make it to New York on time.  _But we know you'll be amazing, honey. We'll come the next time, okay?_  Blaine was finishing his junior year at NYADA. He'd been in a few productions and even performed for a bunch of senators in his freshman year, but they never came. The next time hadn't come yet.

He came to the meeting with June with a frown on his face, his head slumped down. They didn't rehearse anything that day. They talked. They talked a lot and that's the reason why Blaine was sitting on the sofa in his and Sam's living room with tears in his eyes, re-thinking his life direction.

Was June right when she said he was relying on others' approval too much? Was it true that he should be more selfish and grab what life was offering him without taking others into consideration? Did June have a point when she told him that he was too young for a committed relationship? Especially, if the boy he was in love with was struggling with wording his love for Blaine. Kurt was graduating NYADA in two weeks and they never had a conversation about what it meant for the two of them. Kurt's band was quite a success in New York. They played a lot and they already had a few gigs out of the city. If they wanted to make it big, they would have to get out the state. How was Blaine, still in college, going to fit in that plan?

* * *

The door to the apartment opened and his boyfriend walked in with a grace of his own. As soon as he spotted miserable Blaine on the couch, he rushed to him, taking his hands in his own.

"Blaine, baby, what's wrong?" He asked warily but Blaine only shrugged his shoulders and freed his hands from Kurt's grip.

"Blaine?"

"Nothing is wrong."

"Then why are you sitting here crying?"

"What are you doing here, Kurt?"

"We were supposed to have a date night."

"Yeah, until you canceled it because of band practise this afternoon. Two hours before we were supposed to meet!"

"I'm sorry. Is it why are you so upset? Blaine, please, don't be mad. Elliot needed to reschedule tomorrow's practice because Ted's parents are coming to New York and they're having dinner with them. We can't afford to skip practise. We're having an important concert next week. You understand that, right?"

"So it's okay to reschedule band practise for Elliot's boyfriend...Your boyfriend can wait. I have never asked you to reschedule your practise no matter what. We agreed to finally have a date since we barely see each other due to finals and other activities we have. I had an awful day and I needed you! I needed you and you put your band first! Why was OUR SCHEDULED date less important than dinner with Ted's parents?" Blaine stated bitterly. He hated to do that. He knew Kurt was genuinely sorry and this was a low blow from Blaine but he couldn't help a pang of jealousy in his chest when he realized that he was once again put aside.

"Blaine…" Kurt pleaded, not sure what Blaine problem was. "You know it's not true. I did my best to cut it short so I could come to you."

"You didn't have to. You should have stayed practicing. After all, you have a big event next week, don't you? You know, you're right. I should be practicing too. The showcase is on Friday. I should just focus on that and forget about everything else. It seems to work for everyone else, maybe I should try it too."

Kurt gaped at him, feeling that something was very, very wrong but he couldn't tell what it was. Blaine was always reasonable. They barely fought. It was usually just a small disagreement that got solved pretty quickly. That's why they worked so great together. This seemed to be a more of an issue than a canceled date night.

"What is this really about, Blaine?" Kurt demanded quietly but firmly.

"What am I to you, Kurt?" Blaine countered with a question. "Do you even love me?"

Kurt put his head into his hands and took a few deep breaths. Blaine's heart was beating wildly in his ribcage, his hands were shaking. He waited for the answer but by the way Kurt was still burning holes into the floor, he knew he wasn't going to get a positive one.

"I'm probably not doing something right, if you have to ask this…"

"Probably not," Blaine repeated. "I think you should go. I...I have a showcase and I need to go over some moves...I don't have time to deal with this."

"Deal with what? Blaine, I really think we should talk about this."

"Just go, Kurt. I want to be alone. I'm really tired. This was an awful day and I can't stand another rejection."

"Another rejec-what?! Baby, please, look at me and tell me what's wrong so I can fix it."

"You can't fix it. Please, leave me alone."

"Okay." Kurt stood up from the couch. "I'll call you in the morning, okay? We'll talk when you feel better."

"Don't."

"Don't what?"

"Don't call me. I need to be alone for a while. I have to focus on the showcase and you have a concert. There is no time for this."

"You can't be serious right now!"

"I'll call you, okay? Just let me be..." Blaine's voice broke. He couldn't keep this conversation any longer without breaking down.

"I'm not leaving because I want to. I'm leaving because YOU asked me to. Call me whenever you want. You know I have my phone on for emergencies 24/7."

"I'm not an emergency, Kurt."

"Yes, you are! Stop being so damn stubborn!" Kurt raised his voice, his anger and hopelessness getting the better of him. "I don't know what happened or why you are in this funk. I've never seen you like this! You are pushing me away for no good reason! I'm going, okay? I'm going because you want me to go but please, baby, please, call me when you feel like it, okay?"

Blaine nodded absently. Kurt understood it was the only response he was going to get so he went with it. He leaned down and kissed the top of Blaine's head before walking to the door.

"I'm always here for you. Don't ever think otherwise." He said clearly for Blaine to hear it and then there was just a soft thump of the closing door audible in the room.

* * *

Kurt sat on the stairs in front of Blaine's apartment building in hope that Blaine would change his mind and come after him. Or call him to come back. Thirty minutes passed after he'd left Blaine and there was still no sign of Blaine trying to contact him.

"Kurt? What are you doing here?" Kurt looked at the boy in front of him, recognising Blaine's best friend and roommate Sam. "Don't you have keys to our apartment?"

"I do...Blaine kicked me out."

"What?!"

"Well, he asked me to leave."

"Why? Did you guys have a fight? What happened?"

"Honestly, I have no idea, Sam. I had to cancel our date, and I'm really sorry about that, but he's very mad. I'm not even sure if there isn't something more to it. He was just really upset…"

"Go home, Kurt. I'll talk to him. Everything will be alright. He is stressed out because of the showcase. He tends to shut everyone out when he is stressed."

"Not me, Sam. He never shuts ME out."

"I'll talk to him and I'll let you know, okay? Go home, you look tired. You can have a heart to heart about his idiotic behavior in the morning."

"Okay. Thanks, Sam." Sam hugged him and disappeared inside of the building.

* * *

"Blaine? Blaine where are you?" Sam yelled at his best friend from the door, hastily taking his shoes off. "Blaine?! Where the hell are you?"

"My room!" Blaine shouted back after a while and Sam marched in without knocking.

"Spill!"

"What?"

"I came home and found poor Kurt sitting on the staircase, Blaine! What happened?"

"I don't wanna talk about it. Shitty day."

"Shitty day? That's not enough, Blaine! No matter how shitty your day was, you shouldn't have kicked your boyfriend out!"

"I didn't kick him out! I asked him to leave!"

"But why?!"

"Because I'm tired of always being second! Because I'm tired of always worrying if people like me enough! I'm tired of everything! I'm tired of a boyfriend who can't even tell me he loves me!"

"What? That's nonsense! Of course Kurt loves you!"

"Does he? When I asked if he loved me, he didn't say anything! Just that he is probably doing something wrong if I have to ask something like that!"

"See? What else do you want? He figured you know how much he loves you!"

"Why does he never say it then?"

"What are you talking about, Blaine? I, personally, heard him say he loves you on many occasions!"

"No, you didn't! He always says I love you, too. He is never the one to say it first! Do you know how it makes me feel?"

"I want you to listen to me very carefully now. Just because someone is saying I love you doesn't mean that they mean it. Have you ever heard that actions speak volumes? Think about it and then tell me, once again, that Kurt doesn't love you." With that, Sam slammed Blaine's door, leaving his moronic friend to deal with his shit alone. It was always the best strategy to make him see his stupidity.

Blaine, just as Sam assumed, curled up into a ball on his bed, sobbing silently in despair. His eyes fell on a book that was on his desk, ready to be adorned with another memoir of their relationship. He got out of the bed and took a scrapbook, opening it on the very first page where the photo of the two of them grinning to the camera was proudly sitting above the audition flyer of Kurt's and Santana's show. Even though Blaine felt awful, he had to smile at the memory of the day when he'd met Kurt Hummel...


	2. Meeting

 

Blaine was clutching an audition flyer in his hand as he was rushing through busy NYADA halls to find the room where audition was held. He was a bit early, he still had some time to spare but it was Kurt Hummel's show he was about to try out for and since Kurt was probably the biggest star at school, he knew many students were going to show up. He needed to make sure he would get an audition spot.

When he stopped in front of room 508, he took a few seconds to calm his heavily beating heart down. He looked around but he didn't see anyone who would resemble an audition wannabe and it eased his mind a bit. He was probably the first one there. He knocked on the open door and walked inside.

Kurt was bending over the table, flipping through some papers. He raised his head and fixed his sight at Blaine, sizing him up from head to toe. Blaine blushed and averted his eyes on the floor. He could tell when a guy was checking him out. He got much better with it since his high school years, however, he felt a bit uneasy every time something like that happened.

"Uhm, hi." Kurt said with a smile. "I'm sorry but this room is taken. I rented it for the rest of the afternoon for auditions."

"I know. I came for an audition."

"You?" Kurt observed him once again and Blaine shifted from foot to foot. "You wanna audition?"

"Y-yes?"

"But it's just a silly student production."

"Am I not allowed to try out for a student production?" Blaine asked, trying to understand what Kurt's problem was.

"No, no. Of course you are allowed to...but why would you do that? You could be on Broadway if you wanted to...You blew everybody's mind with your talent last year. You won the winter showcase. Only Rachel Berry managed to do that as a freshman."

"I...I'm not Rachel Berry." Blaine told him, offended. "I came to school to learn something. I need to gain some experience. I'm still not sure whether I want to go for theater or music. I just want to audition for your show. But if it's not okay with you then I guess I'll go."

"No! Oh my god, no! I didn't mean to scare you away. I'm Kurt." Kurt outstretched his hand and Blaine shook it.

"I know. I'm Blaine."

"I know." Kurt grinned at him. "I'm really thrilled that you're here. I would have never thought you might be interested in my show. You're probably the most talented student at school so it's an honor to have you here."

" _You_  are the most talented student at NYADA." Blaine stated boldly, his cheeks red. "I'd like to work with you and learn something from you."

"Oh...thank you. You are so sweet."

"Kurt? What the hell?" A latina girl stormed into the room like a hurricane and threw her bag on the table. "Stop flirting with the hobbit! We have to prepare for auditions."

"Santana!" Kurt hissed but the girl just shrugged her shoulders and hopped on the table, crossing her long legs and adjusting her top. She was going to drive boys crazy. Blaine was so glad he wasn't interested in women at all. It would be a big distraction during an audition. He glanced at Kurt and that moment he realized he was as screwed as the straight boys.

"Blaine is here for an audition." Kurt explained to Santana and Blaine found himself under her scrutinizing eyes. He felt intimidated.

"He doesn't fit." Santana announced.

"What?!"

"Come on, Kurt! We need five guys and you know the characters. You're the one who wrote them for God's sake! We are looking for tall and strong men."

"But Blaine is the best this school has!"

"I don't argue with that, Kurt. But he doesn't fit. He is a midget. Sorry, hobbit." Santana sent him an apologetic half smile and Blaine wanted to die from embarrassment.

"You are very rude, Santana!" Kurt scolded her. "Don't listen to her, Blaine."

"I'm not letting you to ruin this production just because you wanna tap that ass, Kurt! You know he doesn't fit so ask him out or whatever but there is no reason for him to audition. I saw at least 20 guys that would be perfect on my way here. Surely some of them will show up. You are Kurt Hummel, everybody wants to be in your show!"

"It's not all about the appearance, Santana! I need them to be able to play the character! Blaine is an amazing actor!"

"This is the best performing arts school in States, Kurt! I'm pretty sure you can't find better actors anywhere else. If you wanted a halfling to be in it, you should have written the part for him!"

"I guess I'm gonna go." Blaine said quietly but neither Kurt nor Santana heard him. He turned around and disappeared very quickly, tears stinging in his eyes. He would have to look for something else to be a part of.

His freshman year was a dream come true. He kicked ass at school, and he knew it. He did his best and was at the top of his class but he focused on school so much that he didn't really make any friends. He might be confident and relaxed on the stage but he had some difficulties being the one to initiate contact with others. When someone addressed him, he easily jumped into a conversation with them, and usually charmed the hell out of them, but he wasn't too active in getting to know other people on his own. He had to change that this year. Starting with Kurt Hummel's show obviously wasn't the brightest idea, though. He should go for a smaller bite.

"Blaine! Blaine, wait!" Blaine stopped in his tracks as soon as he recognized the voice yelling at him.

"God! For someone so small you sure do walk fast."

"You don't have to remind me of my height. I've heard enough of that for one day."

"I'm sorry." Kurt said sincerely. "I want to apologize for the scene we made. Santana can be a treat and I didn't handle the situation very well. Please, don't take it personally. I think you are very talented and tall or not, you're exceptional. I'll try to convince her to give you a chance, okay? Because I would love to have you in the show.I'm really, really sorry, Blaine."

"Was she right?"

"What?"

"Do I fit or not? Tell me the truth."

"Well, not really but I can make some changes and…"

"Kurt, it's okay. If I don't fit in, than I don't fit in. No one can play everything. Maybe next time. Thanks for the offer, though. I appreciate that."

"I hate to do this." Kurt whined. "It's happened to me before and I hated it."

"You've been rejected because of your height?"

"No. But I didn't get Tony in West Side Story my senior year of high school because, even though I was talented, I wasn't manly enough." It was Blaine's turn to check Kurt out, openly and without any shame.

"You?" He asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I looked a bit different back then..." Kurt dismissed it with a waving hand and smiled at Blaine. "I have to go back. But I'm really glad I had a chance to meet you. I've been trying to approach you since you came here but you always vanished when I spotted you. It was like chasing a ghost."

"Oh…" Blaine face turned red again. He was mad at himself for acting like a school boy with a biggest crush on Kurt. Not that he wasn't just that.  _Get a grip, Anderson!_ He internally lectured himself. "Ehm...maybe...maybe we could get a coffee sometime?"

Kurt's face lit up and he nodded enthusiastically. "Yes, of course, I would love that!"

"Great."

"See you, Blaine. And once again, I'm really sorry."

"It's okay. See you, Kurt."

It wasn't until his high from asking Kurt out faded away, when he realized that they hadn't exchanged numbers and hence he had no way of contacting Kurt. The only thing he could hope for was running into him at school soon.

 


	3. Coffee

_Blaine turned the page in the scrapbook and looked at the wrapper of sugar with the logo of their favorite campus coffee shop on it…_

The days following the infamous audition were tiresome. Blaine did what he could to make sure he wouldn't run into Kurt. He saw him daily - talking to someone in hallways, eating in a campus canteen or walking to class. Blaine turned around and left every time, feeling stupid for thinking that Kurt might have taken an interest in him. If he saw Kurt, Kurt must see him too, right? He never came to Blaine, though, so he was probably just being polite when he agreed on coffee with Blaine.

A week later, Blaine decided it was time to forget the stupid crush on Kurt Hummel he'd had since he started at NYADA, and move on. The decision came during Cassandra July's morning class, when she once again reminded all of her students how useless they were. Blaine knew he was a good dancer. She didn't pick on him as often as on other students but sometimes she let him have it pretty bad just so he wouldn't think too much of himself. The choreography they were practising was hard but doable. If Blaine wasn't preoccupied with Kurt, he would have managed...and he wouldn't have been scolded like a child by his teacher.  _No Kurt from now on_ , Blaine told himself and planned on keeping this resolution, but faith had something different in for him.

He was the last to leave the room, earning few words of disgust from Cassandra on his way out. His head was dropped down and he didn't really look where he was going until someone's boots came into his way of vision. He raised his eyes and there he was - Kurt, in all his glory, with two coffee to go mugs in his hands.

"Hi! You need to watch where you are going. You almost spilled your coffee on me." Kurt told him with a big smile.

"What?"

"It's impossible to track you down." Kurt shook his head disbelievingly and nudged Blaine's shoulder to get him to move. "I had to bribe the lady at the dean's office to let me see your schedule. How was Cassandra? Crazy as always?"

Blaine nodded as Kurt led them through hallways out to the courtyard. He turned left and crossed the lawn, heading to the bench behind the big tree. Blaine wordlessly followed him. They sat down and Kurt handed him his coffee.

"A medium drip. How did you know?" Blaine asked, amazed, when he got his usual coffee order from Kurt.

"The girl you often flirt with in the coffee shop has a shift today. I asked her."

"I do not flirt with Clara!"

"You so do! You actually fooled me into thinking that you were straight last year when I watched the two of you!"

"You watched me talking to a barista in the coffee shop?"

"I watch you, period." Kurt admitted. "As I said, you are hard to track down. I've been trying to approach you since you came here."

"Why?"

"First of all, you are extremely talented and you seem to be a genuinely nice person so I want to add you into my small circle of friends. You are also gorgeous. You can't blame a guy for looking."

"Didn't you have a boyfriend when I started here?"

"I did," Kurt grinned. "He caught me staring at you a few times and we got into a fight. He was bit of a drama queen. One of the reasons we broke up eventually...Anyway, here is my phone. Put your number in it. I don't want to play stalker anymore."

Blaine took Kurt's phone and typed his number in it, biting his lips nervously. Did Kurt really just asked for his number? Well, asked wasn't probably the proper term. He practically ordered Blaine to give it to him. What for? Because Kurt wanted to be a friend? Or maybe something more? Blaine was internally squealing like a schoolgirl but he stayed calm on the outside. He returned the phone back to his owner and fidgeted with his coffee.

"It's gonna get cold." Kurt pointed on his mug and observed Blaine closely. "Did Clara lie to me? It's not your coffee order?"

"No, it is my coffee order."

"Then why aren't you drinking? You wanted to go for a coffee with me and right now I'm the only one drinking coffee...Oh god! You didn't mean it, did you? You were just being nice so I wouldn't feel like such an asshole after Santana didn't allow you to audition…"

"What?"

"You know, you can't offer a coffee date and then change your mind without telling the person first. It's not nice."

"I didn't change my mind…" Blaine spoke softly. It wasn't utterly the truth but Kurt didn't need to know that. "I meant it."

"Then what's wrong?"

"I-I can't drink coffee without any sugar...It's disgusting."

"Oh shit! I'm sorry." Kurt put his mug on the bench and reached for his bag, retrieving five packets of cane sugar. "Here. Clara said that you use three but I took more, just in case."

"Thank you. Three is enough." Blaine said shyly but took all the sugar from Kurt's hand, putting the two remaining into his pocket.

"I don't really have much time. My class starts in fifteen minutes but I'd really love to see you again. Dinner? Saturday? I'll call you and we can talk details."

"I can't on Saturday. It's Star Wars marathon and it's kind of a thing for me and my roommate. Friday?"

"Star Wars? Ok, I'm gonna overlook the fact that you like that nonsense but only because you're really cute." Kurt smirked at him teasingly.

"I'm gonna overlook that you just called Star Wars 'nonsense' but only because YOU are cute." Blaine responded, earning a laugh from Kurt.

"Very well then. So when are these cute boys gonna meet for dinner? I can't on Friday. My band has a gig at 17's Bar. Sunday?"

"Sunday sounds good. Can I come to your gig on Friday?"

"Sure. I'll reserve you a seat."

"Thanks."

"I really have to go." Kurt stood up and threw his mug into a trash can. "It was nice. Next time I'll stick around for little longer. I promise."

"Can I walk you to the class? I'm free for another hour."

"Okay. I have Basics of Scene and Costume Design. It's in building D."

"Wow. I wouldn't even think about signing up for that course. I have Survey of Arts Management as an elective this semester. It's very interesting and not too stressful."

"I was an intern for Vogue dot com two years ago. I like designing. It's not stressful at all for me."

"NO WAY! I love Vogue!"

"I'll tell you all about it on Sunday."

"Can't wait."

"Me neither."


	4. 17's bar

 

 _Right below the sugar wrapper was a piece of paper with a sign -_ Reserved for Blaine _. It was neatly written in Kurt's handwriting and there was a little heart with a smiley face next to it. Blaine ran his thumb over it, still considering it one of his most precious possessions..._

Blaine had seen Kurt perform with his band but he had to admit that they got better after summer break. The pub was full and Blaine was happy that he had his small table. He was sipping his cola and wondering whether Kurt would stop by now, when they finished, or if he should go home. He didn't make any formal plans for the evening with Kurt. They talked on the phone a bit two nights in a row but neither of them said anything about post concert hanging out.

"You're still here!" Kurt exclaimed excitedly and took a free chair from a nearby table to sit next to him.

"Was I not supposed to be?"

"No! I'm glad that you're here. You have that movie marathon tomorrow so I wasn't sure how long you would stay."

"It's not that late."

"What are you drinking?"

"Cola."

"Just cola?"

"Yeah."

"Do you want something stronger? Beer? Wine? Vodka?" Kurt asked and stood up, waving at a bartender to come to them.

"I'm not even twenty yet." Blaine protested, making Kurt laugh.

"You want me to believe that you never have something alcoholic?"

"Not in public…"

"Two beers, please." Kurt told to a bartender and put his attention back to Blaine. "So what do you say? Did you like us?"

"You were fantastic! Much better than last time I heard you. Not that you weren't good then but damn, Kurt, you guys rock!"

"Thanks. When was the last time you saw our band? I thought you'd never seen us play."

"You really think there is a student at NYADA that hasn't been to your concerts yet? You are a legend, Kurt! Everybody wants to see you in action." Kurt shifted on his chair, casting his sight on the table. Blaine could swear he was blushing but it was hard to tell in a dimly lit corner of the bar they were sitting in.

"It makes me feel a bit better, you know...that you saw me. I don't feel like such a creep for watching you all this time..." Kurt admitted.

"Oh, it's flattering, actually. I would have never imagined that you could take such an interest in me."

"Are you kidding me? You consider me a legend but YOU are the one who got into NYADA right after audition! No one ever accomplished that before you swept Carmen off her feet."

"She was in a good mood…" Blaine shrugged his shoulders as if it was nothing to get into the most prestigious performing arts school in country on the spot. People were talking about it for a while but the sensation got old after few weeks. Kurt...well, that was a different story. Everybody talked about Kurt constantly. About his performance at Winter Showcase that got him in. Or about his victory at Midnight Madness - which Blaine was particularly sad to miss since it had happened a year before he came to New York. Seeing Kurt win against Rachel Berry would be a treat. Then there was Kurt's band that was slowly making a name for itself in the city and, of course, Kurt's heroic action when he wanted to help a guy who was being beaten up that landed him into a hospital for a few days. And not to mention how he killed it on their Sondheim assignment right after he was released. Even with bruises, cuts and scratches, Blaine was mesmerized with his beauty. He'd almost approached him then. But before he got a chance, Kurt was surrounded by his family and friends so, instead, he left.

"You are too modest, Blaine. I like it, though. It's a nice change after dealing with Santana and Rachel who are everything but."

"Rachel is very self-centered," Blaine stated, expressing his opinion clearly. "She is very talented; I will give her that. But I think she is just a spoiled brat who doesn't know how to take direction. Who in their right mind would drop out of NYADA? And then quit a show as Funny Girl? Well, a self-centered brat who wants the world to revolve around her. That's the only explanation I found when I tried to understand why she would leave Broadway for a TV show that is about  _her_. Thousands of people apply for NYADA every year and only very few of them get in! She left and her spot is free now. Someone else could have been there, taking advantage of the opportunity for a great education."

"Wow," Kurt said, impressed. "What a speech."

"I would say sorry for talking like that about your friend but I'm not sorry, so I'm not gonna lie."

"She is one of my best friends," Kurt folded his arms on his chest, his expression unreadable.

"Well, it's not a reason to blindly justify her actions." Blaine argued. "My best friend was a male striper for a while during high school because he wanted to provide for his family. Am I gonna say it was right and that he wasn't stupid to do something like that? No! It was stupid and I told him just that. If she is your friend, you should help her to see how foolish she is."

"I did." Kurt replied. "I told her what I thought about it and we got into a fight. Like five minutes before I was beaten up this spring."

"Oh…"

"You are something else, Blaine Anderson. I like your fierce attitude. And yes, you are right. She is a spoiled brat but you don't know much about her beside what you heard from others so don't be too harsh on her. She might have done some things differently but who are we to judge? It's not like we're flawless, right? I'm pretty sure you would like her. But I do understand, now, why you were so offended when you told me last week that you are not Rachel Berry."

"Maybe we should change the topic."

"Okay. I already know where you're from but I still don't know where you currently live..."

"Bowery."

"No way! I'm so jealous. I'm stuck in Bushwick! How can you afford that?"

"My parents. And my roommate pays half of the rent so it's not that bad. We lived in Brooklyn but my parents didn't like the neighborhood. We moved out as soon as Sam got the job with a modeling agency. He earns good money. I live mostly from what my parents send me every month."

"I live in a loft. I love the place but I don't like the surroundings. We found it when we first came to New York and couldn't afford anything else. It was me, Santana and Rachel. Now it's only me. Santana moved in with her girlfriend and Rachel is in L.A. My dad forces me to look for something better. Safer. Especially after the attack…"

"Aren't you afraid there? All alone?"

"Not really. Nothing happened to me there."

"You were beaten up…"

"Yeah, I was. Not in Bushwick though."

"So are you looking for a new apartment now?"

"I am," Kurt sighed. "But I can't find anything that strikes my fancy for a reasonable price…"

"I know what you mean…"

"It's a bit loud here. Can I walk you home? We can have better talk outside." Kurt suggested and Blaine agreed. They finished their beers, Kurt quickly told his bandmates that he was leaving and they were off to the night city.

It took them almost hour to get to Blaine's apartment. Blaine was trying to convince Kurt that it wasn't necessary to go with him all the way. He would, in fact, prefer if Kurt would take a train straight home before midnight but Kurt wouldn't have any of it. After getting tired of arguing, Kurt at least promised Blaine not to go to Bushwick and spend the night on Elliot's couch because Elliot lived just next to the subway station. Blaine was somehow satisfied with this solution, even though he still didn't like Kurt wandering the city alone at night.

Except for this little inconvenience, the walk home was very pleasant. Kurt finally told Blaine about his internship at Vouge dot com and Blaine shared the stories about how he supported Sam at his auditions. He filled Kurt in why he was so sensitive about the jokes about his height and how people wrongly assumed he wanted to work as a model - which he wasn't tall enough for as they reminded him daily - when he accompanied Sam.

"We're here." Blaine stopped in front of the staircase to the four story building. "The subway station is right down the street. I would walk you there but I don't want to fight again."

"You worry too much, Blaine. I can take care of myself."

"The city can be dangerous."

"I know. But it's Friday night. There'll be lot of people who are going out tonight in trains. It'll be like taking a train during the day." Kurt assured him.

"Just be careful, okay?"

Kurt smiled and stepped closer to Blaine. He kissed his cheek softly and wrapped his arms around Blaine's shoulders in a quick hug.

"I will. I'll text you when I'm at Elliot's apartment. Go to sleep, enjoy your Star Wars marathon tomorrow and I'll see you at dinner on Sunday."

"Can I walk you home on Sunday for a change?"

"No," Kurt giggled. "But nice try. Goodnight, Blaine."

"Goodnight, Kurt." Blaine watched Kurt's lithe steps until he disappeared in the subway station. He never told Kurt that he did not go to sleep right away. He stayed up another hour, waiting for Kurt's text and only when he was certain Kurt was safe, he let the dreamland reign over him.


	5. Dinner

 

 _If the_ Reserved for Blaine _sign from 17's Pub was Blaine's most precious possession, the four leaf clover on the next page of their scrapbook was definitely Kurt's. Blaine gave it to him on their first date and Kurt kept it in a little wooden box he got from his mother when he was five. When they first started putting the scrapbook together, Blaine was very surprised that Kurt still had it. He glued it in the middle of the page and put their early photos around, claiming it was his lucky charm because it helped him to win Blaine's heart…_

Dinner in a small restaurant in Little Italy, not too far from Blaine's apartment, was a lot more than Blaine expected. He, somehow, found a way not to be awkward - which happened a lot when he was in Kurt's presence - and they had an amazing time. There was so much to talk about, so much to learn about each other and they both seemed to be thirsty for information but still cautious about what to ask so they wouldn't push any boundaries the other might have.

All in all, everything was going smoothly and neither of them really wanted to go home after dinner was over so they decided to walk to nearby Columbus Park.

"I like coming here," Blaine said as they sat down on a bench in the furthest corner of the park.

"Do you come here often?"

"Yeah. When I need to clear my head...It closes at nine, though. I'd love to come here late at night sometimes, when it's dark and silent…"

"You can break in." Kurt suggested teasingly.

"I'm not really one for breaking the rules, Kurt."

"Such a shame. And here I was, thinking I was having dinner with a bad boy!"

"I'm anything but," Blaine admitted with a soft smile. "I always follow the rules and try to please everyone."

"Do you like it?" Kurt asked, the teasing tone in his voice gone now.

"What?"

"Obeying rules and pleasing everyone?" Blaine fixed his eyes on the stone in front of him. Did he like it? It was a simple question about something that was an essential part of him but he couldn't find a simple answer for it.

"I didn't really think about it…" He said after a while. "I always did what I was supposed to do. I guess I was raised this way. Why do you want to know?"

"I feel like rules are suffocating me...I always tried to break them. I try to show people that I can live my life the way I want to, not the way they expect me to. It wasn't the brightest idea in Ohio but it works for me here. I was just curious how you feel about it."

"I guess for me it's more about making my parents proud of me. As a kid, I thought they would want to spend more time with me if I behaved myself. It didn't really get me a lot of the attention I was hoping for but I still did it...I'm still doing it, actually." Blaine shrugged his shoulders like it was nothing, the habit he used to do a lot. Kurt was watching him sadly, and Blaine knew they crossed the line they were trying to avoid at dinner table.

"You think your parents aren't proud of you?"

"No. They are. I know they are...they just...they never seem to be around, you know. I'm on my own. We talk on the phone and they are sweet and caring but they've never been next to me when something big was happening...Like when I performed for the Senators last year...They couldn't make it because my dad had a lot of work."

"What does he do?"

"He is a lawyer. He is very interested in the gay agenda. He has sent many people to jail for hate crimes."

"Oh my god! Your dad is Phillip Anderson! Jesus, I love what he is doing for us! My dad works with him closely. Your father has helped him a lot with bills that concerned gay rights!"

"Yeah...That's my father. The most prominent lawyer in all of Ohio…"

"He's a more of a lawyer than a father, isn't he?"

"Is your father more of a Senator than a father?"

"No." Kurt answered, casting his eyes down. "My dad is...my dad is the most important person in the whole world to me. He's the only one from whom I search for acceptance . He is busy with his work and I'm here, living my life as an independent human being. We don't have much time for each other, that's true but he is there for me anytime I need him. If I was still a kid, or in high school, I think I would view it differently. My dad became a Senator when I was in my senior year in high school. I was happy when he wasn't home." Blaine chuckled at that. Growing up, his father wasn't home a lot. Blaine started to see the appeal of that when he was in high school and his mother started to accompany him more often. However, he would exchange every single business trip and court hearing when he could do whatever he wanted to do because his parents weren't home for his father to see him perform at least once a year.

"I have an older brother," Blaine confessed. "I don't talk about him much because everybody takes a lot of interest in him and I feel put aside...Again. He is eight years older, trying to make a name for himself in Hollywood. He is pretty successful in commercials and he had a few small appearances in TV shows. Mostly just an episode now and then...I remember how we attended every competition or production he was in when he was at school. It was a family event...When my time came, he was leaving for L.A. and my dad won a big case which landed him in the top ten lawyers in the state. It was only my mom seeing me perform. It was our mother-son events... until high school. She didn't bother anymore, claiming she wouldn't wanna embarrass me since none of my classmates' parents never went anywhere."

"Have you tried talk to them about how you felt?"

"Yes. But you know, my father is a lawyer. Your arguments are always invalid in comparison to his...Lots of gay kids talk about how they lost their parents after coming out...I feel the same way. Just for different reasons. My father became so invested in gay rights, and the topic in general, that he sometimes forgets that, behind it all, there are individuals that need their family - with or without laws that give us the same treatment as straight people have. I am one of those individuals. I should be his son first rather than a member of the community he fights for." Blaine didn't dare to look directly at Kurt after he basically spilled his guts to him. He glanced sideways at the boy sitting next to him, wondering if he scarred Kurt for life. What was he thinking laying his problems on Kurt like that?

"I'm glad you're the member of gay community. I would be screwed, had you been straight." Kurt noted lightly and Blaine burst into a laughter. "Don't try to please others, Blaine. You've been given just one life to live. In the end, the only person you have to justify yourself to is you."

"It's pretty selfish, isn't it?"

"Maybe. But if you don't hurt others intentionally in the process, I don't see a problem. I'm not telling them how to live their life, they have no right to interfere with mine."

"And you said  _I'm_  something else…" Blaine trailed off and stood up. "We should probably go. The park closes soon."

"Okay. I have to go home anyway. I have class early in the morning." Kurt added.

"I'll walk you to the station."

"No. I'll walk you home and take the subway."

"Kurt," Blaine warned him. "I don't want you to-"

"It's not even nine yet, Blaine." Kurt interrupted him. "You live ten minutes from here! I'll get home safe and sound, I promise. I've been in this city for two years now. I know my way around here."

"Why are you so stubborn?"

"Because I'm my dad's son." Kurt replied and squatted down, running his fingers through grass. "Do you think we could find a four leaf clover in here?"

"I don't know. Maybe. But the search will probably be more efficient in a day light."

"Probably but it wouldn't be half as much fun." Kurt took out his phone and turned on his flashlight application, roaming between soft blades of grass, looking for a small plant that was believed to bring some luck. Blaine joined him in his effort, waiting for a guard to kick them out any minute.

"I found one!" Blaine carefully picked the green treasure from the lawn and handed it to Kurt.

"Oh, it's yours! I can't take it." Kurt protested. "I'll have to find my own."

"I want you to have it." Blaine insisted. "It's a one in a million chance that you will find one."

"You did."

"And now you have to wait for million other people to try, and fail, until you'll find yours." Blaine laughed.

"You're ridiculous."

"Take it, Kurt. Please." Blaine outstretched his hand and Kurt took the flower from his palm, putting it in his wallet.

"Thank you." Kurt said and entwined his fingers with Blaine's, leading the way out of the park.

"You're welcome."

Blaine never really held anyone's hand before in public, he hadn't dared to do it with his boyfriend back in Ohio and Kurt was the first person he'd been on a date with since he came to New York. It was strange. He was afraid that he would start sweating and Kurt would never want to hold his hand again. He was so lost in his own thoughts that he didn't realize how nice it was when Kurt squeezed his hand occasionally or how he never dropped it, even when he was talking animatedly about the rehearsing process of his play, gesturing like a mad man, with Blaine's fingers securely around his own. And if Blaine wasn't focused on a thing that didn't matter at all, he would most likely catch disappointment in Kurt's features, after he automatically turned his cheek to him when Kurt tried to kiss him goodnight.

 


	6. Friendzoned dating

 

_Blaine was a big fan of photobooth pictures. They may be tacky to some people, but according to Blaine, they were classy. Over almost two years together, Kurt and he made many of those. They have an extra photo album just for the photobooth shots of them. Two sets of pictures from a little photo cabin from the subway station near Blaine's apartment made their way into their scrapbook. One of them was what Kurt considered their first photo as a couple, the other one was taken a month later and Blaine tried to convince Kurt that, in fact, that was their first photo as a couple…because on the first one he didn't even known they were already dating..._

After the dinner date, Blaine wasn't really sure where the two of them stood. In the next couple of weeks, they met regularly - in between classes, having coffee, hanging out with Kurt's friends or Sam and spending a lot of time alone, too - cuddling on Kurt's sofa while watching his impressive collection of musicals, holding hands on the walk through the city, hugging hello and goodbye, always accompanied with a kiss on a cheek from Kurt.

Blaine didn't know what to think about it. Kurt was all touchy-feely when it was just the two of them but as soon as they were amongst other people, he acted like they were nothing more than good friends.

They never acknowledged the nature of their relationship and Blaine was too shy to ask. He went with Kurt on this one and decided not to look too much into it. They were friends. It was much more than Blaine expected in the beginning of the year, so in a way, he was still a winner. He did his best to ignore a speeding heartbeat everytime he thought of Kurt...or saw Kurt...or talked about Kurt...or heard someone else mention Kurt's name...God, he was so screwed! A little crush - okay, one of the biggest crushes known to a man - changed into  _I'm falling for you hard and fast, yet you see me as a friend_  thing.

Blaine loved everything they did together but his favorite spare time activity was gossiping with Kurt over a cup of coffee in the campus coffee shop. Kurt was just telling him how a guy who got the lead in his play finally got together with a girl who helped them with lightning and how it was his biggest achievement in that field since he never got anywhere when he tried to be a matchmaker. Blaine listened to every word Kurt said intently, giving his input now and then, completely oblivious to what was going on around him. He got startled by his classmate in the middle of their conversation, almost spilling his coffee.

"Oh my god! I'm so sorry," his classmate said. "I didn't mean to scare you."

"It's okay," Blaine smiled at him and noticed how Kurt observed the guy with a scrutinizing sight.

"So," the classmate started nervously. "I meant to ask you after class but you were out of there pretty quickly…"

"Oh, I was meeting Kurt and I didn't want to be late. What's up?"

"Well, it's about the assignment the professor gave us today. Have you thought about whether you want to work on it alone or with someone?"

"I usually choose assignments for individuals. I haven't looked into them yet, though. Why?"

"I was thinking that maybe we could do something together? Maybe an analysis of baroque music and turning it into drum and bass style?" Kurt raised his eyebrow, apparently judging the guy hard.

"It's not really my style," Blaine answered. "I don't know a thing about drum and bass."

"Okay, so what if we got to know each other better? We can come up with something that both of us would like. What do you say? Dinner and a movie? I know this little restaurant where we could talk privately…" The guy said suggestively and Kurt had enough.

"Really?" He asked mockingly. "You have some nerve to ask him out while he is sitting here with a guy he is currently dating! Dinner and movie so you can work on a school assignment? You think I'm stupid? At least you could have asked him when I wasn't around!"

"You are dating him?"

"Of course I am! Jesus, we're inseparable. Haven't you seen us on campus this past month? What is wrong with you?"

"Nothing. But does Blaine know you are dating him? Because I heard him yesterday, when he talked to the girl behind the counter, that you two are just friends. You can't blame me for trying." Kurt's eyes fell from the guy speaking and then onto Blaine, finding him surprisingly staring at Kurt.

"You told Clara that we're just friends?" Kurt asked, shocked.

Blaine nodded wordlessly.

"Okay. I-I guess I'm gonna go and leave you two discuss your assignment or whatever." Kurt stood up and left the coffee shop before Blaine managed to blink.

"So," the guy started again. "About that date…"

"What?!" Blaine hastily picked up his bag and jumped from his chair. "I can't go on a date with you. I have a boyfriend!"

"Yesterday you didn't have one!" The guy complained but Blaine was almost at the door.

"Yesterday I didn't know I had him!" He exclaimed and ran out. He caught up with Kurt's long legs down the street, right before he was about to cross the road.

"Kurt! Wait!"

"Blaine, I made a complete fool of myself just now. Please, give me some time to process it before I can face you again, okay?"

"No!" Blaine grabbed his shoulder and turned him around. "What the hell was that? How was I supposed to know that we are dating when you never said a thing?"

"Our first date was over a month ago! We've been out on dates countless times since then, Blaine! You met my friends! I hold your hand regularly! We cuddle for God's sake! How was  _I_  supposed to know we were  _not_  dating?"

"You never hold my hand when we hang out with our friends or here in school! You always kiss me on the cheek! In what world is that dating?"

"Every time I try to kiss you, you show me your cheek! I thought you wanted to go slow. I thought maybe you weren't comfortable with PDA when people who know you are around. So I kept it simple, waiting for you to give me a sign that it's okay to hold your hand on campus or kiss you!" Blaine took exactly four steps to get right into Kurt's face and leaned forward, pressing his lips against Kurt's firmly.

"It's okay to kiss me."

"Thank God!" Kurt murmured and took Blaine's face into his hands, kissing him tenderly as he meant to do since their first date.

"I'm sorry I missed our first month anniversary." Blaine told him after Kurt broke the kiss.

"It's okay. We can celebrate our five week anniversary this Sunday."

"I'd love that."

"I'm going to hold your hand," Kurt announced, lacing their fingers together. "And kiss you," he pecked Blaine's lips briefly, "frequently, wherever and whenever we are, so no one gets some funny ideas about asking MY boyfriend out."

"Your boyfriend is all for it." The bright smile on Kurt's face was everything Blaine needed to make him happy for the whole week.

 


	7. Moving out

 

_There was a double page spread of photos from Kurt's loft in Bushwick. Blaine loved the place, he couldn't really argue with Kurt about that. What he absolutely hated was the neighbourhood. He wished they could somehow move the loft somewhere safer but it wasn't possible. And Kurt was very reluctant to move out. Blaine was glad that they at least had the pictures from Kurt's previous home. No matter how dangerous living there might have been, it still held some precious moments of their early relationship…_

"I want you to go and look at that one," Blaine pointed his finger at the ad in newspapers. "It sounds really good."

"Every apartment we've been to this past two months sounded good even though they sucked in reality."

"Kurt, why do you have to be so difficult?"

"I'm not difficult. I can tell the place is small."

"You are not going to find a new apartment if you keep looking for enormous space!"

"I'm fine with the apartment I currently live in." Kurt reminded his boyfriend, already tired with the topic of their conversation. He came to hang out with Blaine and enjoy the quiet evening with dinner and movie on his couch. He surely didn't sign for apartment hunting. Again.

"But I'm not!" Blaine huffed and folded his arms on his chest. Kurt hardly saw Blaine upset or demanding. In Kurt's eyes, Blaine was the sweetest - I need to please everyone - guy and he never made any requirements.

"Hey, what's up, baby?" Kurt asked softly.

"You know your dad hates that you stay in Bushwick! You know I hate that you are still there and you keep looking for faults in every place I suggest! You don't even try to see the bright side of it! I'm worried about you every time you stay out late! I wait until you text me that you're home before I can go to sleep! And I know that you've been on your own long before we got together but it's the way it is! I can't help but worry about you and I would much rather have you in a small place somewhere safer than in a big loft in the neighbourhood you live in now! It's been two months and you didn't like a single one, Kurt! At this rate you are going to graduate from NYADA before you move out from that hole!"

"Blaine, when we have a gig I don't come home before at least midnight…Why the hell are you awake waiting for my text?"

"Last Tuesday I was up until three." Blaine murmured.

"Shit! Blaine, why didn't you tell me? I thought you wanted me to text you so you would know in the morning that I'm safely home. I had no idea you waited for my messages!"

"Well, I do. I thought it was obvious."

"You really worry about me that much?"

"I'm afraid something is going to happen to you...You say that nothing has ever happened but I feel like it's just a lucky coincidence with the neighborhood your building is in." Kurt wrapped his arm around Blaine's shoulders, running his fingers up and down Blaine's arm while Blaine snuggled into his side.

"I promise to be more open minded when it comes to finding a new apartment for me."

"Thank you."

"Why didn't you tell me that it upsets you so much?"

"Because I didn't want to sound controlling or whiny...I respect your independence and...never mind…"

"And?" Kurt prompted sternly.

"You said your ex was a whiny bitch...I'm nothing like him...I didn't want to give you a reason to compare us…"

"Blaine," Kurt cupped Blaine's cheek to make his boyfriend look at him. "You're right. You are NOTHING like him. I would never compare you two. He was too much for me. He put everything he had into our relationship too soon and it slowly sucked him in. He didn't have life outside of us and it became a big problem. He expected me to be with him 24/7, he hated when I hung out with my friends, he didn't like my band. He just wanted to keep me in a cage. You worrying about my safety is completely different thing."

"Why did you stay with him for almost a year then?"

"He was my first boyfriend and I liked him enough. We had fun in the beginning. It was thrilling and exciting. He was sweet and he made me feel loved. I thought I could fall in love with him. When he turned into a lunatic, I felt badly for him and I didn't want to break his heart. I was taught to work on a relationship before giving up, so I tried to make it better. I broke things off when I came to the conclusion that there was no way I was ever gonna love him the way he loved me and that he would be better off without me. He wasn't happy. He demanded what he was giving into our relationship back but I wasn't able to give it to him. There wasn't a balance between us."

"Is there a balance between us?" Blaine dared to ask.

"For me, there is. I hope you feel the same."

"I do."

"Whatever bothers you, I need to know. It's the only way to make this work. And I really, really want us to work."

"Me too." Kurt smiled at Blaine's response. He slowly moved forward, capturing Blaine's lips with his own.

"Can we forget the new apartment for a while and maybe make out before I have to go?" Instead of the answer, Blaine pushed Kurt down onto the sofa and got on top of him, meeting Kurt's hungry mouth in a heated kiss. Everything could wait when his boyfriend's hands were roaming up and down his back and their lips were sealed together until they hurt.

* * *

The following week was very strange. Blaine couldn't put his finger on it. Seemingly, everything was fine. Except it wasn't. Kurt kept finding reasons to not to see Blaine after school, rejecting his offers to go to band practise with him or at least having dinner with him after the practise. At school, Kurt was the same as before. They had coffee every day, walked around campus between classes or went to wander the city when their break was longer. They held hands and the amount of kisses Kurt endowed him with was nothing out of order. Still, Blaine felt like he crossed the line when he pushed Kurt into finding a new place to live.

When Kurt cancelled their Saturday shopping trip, Blaine knew something was very wrong. He spent the day wondering how much time it would take for Kurt to break up with him. Sam tried to cheer him up but even Star Wars fanfiction that always helped didn't fulfilled its purpose. Kurt didn't call him the whole day and all Blaine was left with was a short text after midnight saying to meet him at the address stated at three the next day.

Blaine obediently went to face his destiny. What else was he supposed to do? He slowly walked to the street Kurt assigned him to. It wasn't more than twenty minutes from his house and Kurt was already waiting on the sidewalk in front of the apartment building. There was no coffee shop around, nothing where they could sit down and talk and Blaine was at a loss as to what exactly they were doing there.

Kurt kissed him sweetly, as every other time, to say hello. He looked tired but his eyes were beaming. He didn't have the vibe of someone who was about to end a relationship and Blaine relaxed completely when he took his hand and led him inside.

"Are we going to see an apartment?" Blaine asked after they entered the elevator and Kurt pushed the button for fifth floor.

"Kind of…"

"Kind of?"

"You'll see." Kurt told him with a big smile and tugged him closer to wrap his arm around Blaine's waist. "I missed you so much this week, baby. I'm sorry we didn't get to go shopping yesterday but I'll make it up to you."

"It's okay. You were busy." Blaine dismissed it immediately, not ready to go into the topic that might not end well. The elevator reached their destination and Kurt dragged Blaine out of it, down the hall, in front of the dark brown wooden door with number 504 on it. Kurt took out a key from his pocket and opened the door, motioning Blaine to step inside.

He found himself in a room that served as kitchen and living room if the small kitchen counter with two barstools and a couch with a coffee table opposite the wall with TV was any indication. There was a coat-rack on his left side and that was it when it came to furniture. The windows were big, though, so the room was light and warm.

"It's nice." Blaine said and looked at Kurt expectantly. "Isn't that your table from the loft?"

"It is. Open the door next to the rack." Blaine did as he was told. What he saw was everything he needed to confirm his suspicion. Kurt's bed with his bedside tables was standing in the middle of the room with a sliding wardrobe on the wall on its left side and windows on the wall on its right side. Blaine couldn't believe it.

"Kurt, you moved out from the loft?"

"I did."

"How? When? Why didn't you tell me?"

"I wanted to do it on my own. I saw this apartment on Tuesday and I knew it was the best I was going to get. So I signed the contract and told my old landlord. I moved in for good yesterday. It was a mess with all the boxes and I needed to clean it up before I was ready to show you."

"After two months of 'nothing is good enough' you moved out of the loft within a week?" Kurt simply nodded and took a seat on the couch. Blaine followed his lead, ready to hear the story behind such an impulsive decision.

"You are very important to me, Blaine. You know that, right?"

"Of course. But..."

"But?" Kurt raised his eyebrows, prompting Blaine to continue.

"You shouldn't have moved out just because of me."

"I didn't know me staying in Bushwick was affecting you so much. I think I underestimated the situation. I felt safe there because I got used to things that I shouldn't have gotten used to. I didn't understand why you and my dad were so forceful with me moving out of there. After our talk last week, I put myself in your shoes. I imagined how I would feel if you were the one living there, and I knew I had to find something else. Something better. I would go crazy if I was to send you home from our date to Bushwick. It never really occured to me how protective I am of you. And it's natural that you are protective of me. I'm not going to let you worry about me more than necessary. You don't do that to me and it's not fair of me to be selfish and do that to you. Also, I like this place. It's a lot smaller than I used to have but at least every room has walls."

"I don't want you to regret this…" Blaine said quietly. Kurt took his hand, stroking his palm with his thumb.

"I won't. I'm just a few blocks from you. I already love this apartment more than the loft."

"We've been together for a little over three months, Kurt. I don't think it was wise to base your decision on this."

"Well, are you planning to break up with me anytime soon?" Kurt asked carefully.

"No!"

"Then we are in for the long haul, Blaine, and I believe I based my decision on the right things." The silence fell on them for a couple minutes. Blaine needed some time to process what Kurt told him and his boyfriend knew him well enough not to say anything until Blaine spoke first. Blaine realized, once again, that he fell hard for Kurt and there was no way back. And he was going to do his best to be everything Kurt needed because there was no way he would willingly give up a guy who made him feel so precious and cared for.

 

 


	8. First time part 1

Blaine found out soon enough that Kurt didn't hesitate to take pictures of him anytime he wanted. He was aware of being captured on camera most of the time but Kurt managed to sneak a few photos where Blaine had no idea Kurt was pressing the shutter. Right now, Blaine was looking at himself, peacefully sleeping in Kurt's bed under the covers. He smiled softly at the memory of the first night he spent naked in Kurt's arms…

It took some time for Blaine to get his head around the fact that Kurt lived near by now. It was a lot to take in. He didn't know how long he just sat there on the couch next to Kurt quietly.

"I like the apartment," he said finally, eliciting a chuckle from Kurt.

"I'm glad you do. I expect you to be around here a lot so it would really suck if you hated it."

"We should toast on your new living space. There is a bar just around the corner, though I'm not sure if it's open so early…"

"No need to go anywhere. I have a bottle of wine in the fridge. My grocery stock is very low right now but I think we can make some sandwiches with what I have here. I'm pretty hungry. I haven't eaten since breakfast." Kurt suggested.

"Sure. We can watch a movie and enjoy the rest of the day here."

"I promise we'll go out tomorrow. I'm just too tired to do anything today."

"It's okay." Blaine assured him and kissed his cheek as he stood up and opened Kurt's fridge, trying to come up with the best idea of how to use the little food Kurt had in there.

They put everything they made on the coffee table and quickly ate it before they started the movie and opened the bottle of wine. Kurt snuggled into Blaine's side, putting his head on Blaine's shoulder. They made themselves comfortable on the sofa, ready to stay there for a few hours. Blaine didn't even realize when Kurt fell asleep on him. He turned the volume on the TV down and closed his eyes. He could use a little nap with his boyfriend too.

He was woken up with sweet little kisses all over his face that slowly brought him to consciousness, tilting his head to nuzzle his nose into Kurt's neck, breathing him in.

"You are the best pillow ever." Kurt told him with a hint of teasing. "I might want to keep you in my bed." Even though it was an innocent comment, Blaine's cheeks went red after what he imagined with that suggestion.

They hadn't done much so far in the intimate part of their relationship. They kissed a lot, always chaste in public and bit more heated in the safety of their homes but, besides a few times when there was some groping involved while making out, everything was very pure, with clothes on. Blaine didn't know what they were waiting for. He was afraid to ask so he simply settled on letting Kurt lead them. Kurt halted every time things got a bit out of ordinary, which got really frustrating as the time passed by, but Blaine wasn't brave enough to tell him to go on.

"What are you thinking of?" Kurt brought him back to earth and Blaine averted his gaze from the wall he was glancing at to his boyfriend. Kurt was observing him curiously, wearing a soft expression on his face. It always surprised Blaine when Kurt looked at him like that. He was a strong and confident young man with piercing eyes and hardly readable features. It was Kurt's way of protecting himself and, even though he had a lot of people around him all the time, there were only few with the privilege to see him for who he was. Blaine was one of them, he was aware of that. But sometimes when it was just the two of them, it seemed like Kurt was revealing yet another layer of himself in front of Blaine….a layer no one except Blaine got to see.

Kurt's eyes went soft, just like now, and there was a glow and some kind of awe in them. Like Kurt couldn't believe Blaine was right there next to him, even though it didn't make any sense to Blaine, because it was him who was constantly amazed that Kurt was actually his. Usually those moments passed quickly, leaving Blaine wondering whether he just made them up or not, but today Kurt was still watching him with a half smile, raising his hand to play with Blaine's curls that managed to escape their gel cover.

Blaine was one hundred percent sure he was already head over heels in love with Kurt and though they never said those words out loud, when Kurt was staring at him like this, Blaine knew his feelings were reciprocated.

Blaine's need to be closer to Kurt overwhelmed him and he suddenly moved forward, catching Kurt's upper lip in his. He cupped Kurt's face and tilted his head so he could deepen the kiss and Kurt hummed appreciatively, diving in just as passionately as Blaine. Their mouths slid together seamlessly, as if it was second nature, hands roaming, gripping, pulling at any accessible part of their bodies. However, it wasn't enough for Blaine. The angle was weird as they were half sitting, half kneeling on Kurt's couch and there was too little physical contact between them. He yanked at Kurt's shirt and tugged him against his chest, adjusting himself so Kurt could easily land in his lap. The second Kurt straddled Blaine's thighs, he pulled away.

"We should cool down…" Kurt said pitifully and tried to sit next to Blaine but Blaine didn't ease his hold on Kurt's waist so he was forced to stay right on top of his boyfriend.

"Or we could continue…" Blaine proposed hopefully, caressing Kurt's lower back with his thumbs.

"Blaine," Kurt gulped and rested their foreheads together. "I don't think I'll be able to behave myself if we carry on…"

"I don't expect you to," Blaine whispered, peppering Kurt's jaw with small pecks. He could feel hesitation fading from Kurt's body and when his hand slipped under Kurt's shirt, he knew he'd won.

Kurt lost his inhibitions, that much was obvious, as his fingers unbuttoned Blaine's shirt, pulling it down his shoulders. He attached his lips to Blaine's collarbone, sucking and licking, his hands running up and down Blaine's chest. It was like all he needed was Blaine's permission and now he could do whatever he wished. Blaine thrust his hips forward, just slightly but the action didn't go unnoticed by Kurt and soon they were rutting against each other rather frantically. Blaine got rid off Kurt's shirt, moaning when their bare torsos collided. Everything felt so good. Kurt skin was soft and when he kissed it, it was warm and a bit sweaty but Blaine loved it. With every swipe of his tongue against Kurt's gorgeous neck Kurt whimpered and pulled at Blaine's hair, grounding his hips down harder. He squeezed Kurt's butt in his hands, forcing him to go faster. He was going to come in his pants, he was sure of it. It had never happened to him before but there was no time to do something about it now.

"Would it - oh, Blaine - would it be - " Kurt tried to say something but Blaine silenced him with a kiss in a fear he would want to stop again.

"Jesus, baby!" Kurt hissed when they pulled away. "Would it be too forward of me if I went for lube and condoms?"

The world stopped turning. Blaine gaped at his boyfriend with his mouth wide open. This was really not how he assumed things would go. Not that he minded. God, he didn't mind at all! He welcomed it!

"Depends on whether you have them or you have to go and buy them." Blaine stated after his mind was ready to function again.

"They're in the bathroom."

"Go and get them!" Blaine pushed Kurt off his lap and in thirty seconds his boyfriend was away, he took off his pants and boxers. When Kurt came back, he hungrily sized him up before pressing him to sit down on the couch again. Blaine grabbed a still standing Kurt by his waist and unfastened his belt and quickly unzipped his jeans, slipping them down his long legs. Kurt kicked them off, peeling his briefs off as well. Everything went so fast. Blaine had difficulties with breathing, he didn't know what to look at or touch first. He had Kurt Hummel naked in front of him and he was barely able to outstretch his hands to put them on his boyfriend's beautiful body. Kurt didn't seem to have the same problem. He returned to his previous position in Blaine's lap, this time gloriously undressed, and resumed kissing Blaine like his life depended on it while stretching himself. Blaine was in a dazzled state as Kurt put a condom on him, too soon in Blaine's opinion, because there was no way Kurt could be open enough for him.

"Wait," Blaine stopped him as he was positioning himself, getting ready to let Blaine slip inside of him. "Let me." Blaine took the bottle of lube and covered his fingers, finishing what Kurt hadn't done properly.

"I could have taken it, baby." Kurt whispered against his temple. "You feel so good, shit Blaine. I'm ready, I need you!"

"Just a bit more."

"You're gonna kill me...come on..." Kurt murmured and groaned. His patience was hitting its limit and after one very successful stroke over his prostate, he snapped and yanked Blaine's fingers out, sliding down on the real thing before Blaine could blink.

"Fuck! I'm sorry!" Kurt framed Blaine's face in his hands as soon as he bottomed out. "Shit!"

"What's wrong?" Blaine asked warily, watching his boyfriend's terrified face.

"Do you want us to stop? I shouldn't have just jumped on you like that. Fuck, Blaine. I'm so sorry."

"Are you serious right now? If you aren't hurting then start moving or I'm gonna die here, Kurt!" A small smile appeared on Kurt's face and Blaine could feel it in their next kiss. It was surprisingly calm and languid, the exact opposite of how the last few minutes had been. Kurt slowly began to raise himself up and down, his lips never leaving Blaine's face. Blaine closed his eyes and threw his head back, drowning in the warmth and tenderness surrounding him. He ran his hands from Kurt's knees to his thighs, caressing them and enjoying how Kurt shivered under his fingers. Blaine cherished every soft moan that escaped his boyfriend's mouth, every whimper and whispered praise. It was him who made Kurt fall apart. It was him who Kurt swamped in kisses and gentle touches.

Blaine was almost there, right on the edge from how perfectly Kurt fit around him. A flash of insecurity struck him all of a sudden. He didn't know anything about Kurt regarding intimacy. They skipped all the steps that might precede full intercourse. He was drawing a blank about whether Kurt was close too, or not, because he'd never seen Kurt in such a situation. How the hell did people have hook ups when they didn't know anything about the other person? Was he about to disappoint rather than satisfy his boyfriend?

"What's wrong, baby?" Kurt's soothing voice and a sweet kiss on his lips calmed him down a little. He was tense, his hands gripping Kurt's hips firmly but all in all he wasn't moving. It was all too overwhelming. Maybe Kurt had been right. They should have stopped.

"I-I'm…" Blaine took a deep breath. Kurt already sensed something was wrong, he may as well come clean, there was no reason to hide anything. "I'm not gonna last. I'm sorry."

Kurt raised his eyebrow and tilted his head a bit. "You're sorry?"

"That this will be over even though it barely started…" And then there it was again. The look in Kurt's eyes that always made Blaine melt. The one that Blaine dared to hope meant Kurt loved him.

"It will. But it's nothing to be sorry about. I'm not too far from coming myself, baby. We have plenty of time to perfect this, but now, I just desperately need to feel you move inside of me and let go. I've been dreaming of this since we got together. I wanna hold you, and kiss you and make you feel good."

"You do...you do make me feel good, Kurt."

"Great," Kurt whispered against his lips as he slowly lifted himself and sunk back again. "You make me feel incredible, Blaine."

Blaine surrendered into a heated kiss and turned his brain off. His body acted of its own accord. He attacked Kurt's neck with his mouth and wrapped his hand around Kurt's length, stroking him with the rhythm of Kurt's movements for a few moments before he was tripping over the edge. He lost all sense of reality for a while. He was aware of Kurt still on top of him, panting and moaning, but all he could do was remain in his own world of afterglow.

Kurt collapsed against him, shaking and he put his arms around him at once, bringing him as close as possible. They stayed like that for a long time before Kurt adjusted them to lay down and throw the blanket over their bodies. Blaine had no idea, when he fell asleep for the second time that afternoon.


	9. First time part 2

Kurt's arm was securely around his waist when he woke up the second time. His back was pressed against Kurt's chest and he could feel Kurt's steady heart beat. He reached for Kurt's hand, bringing it to his lips to kiss his knuckles. Kurt kissed the back of his neck in return and Blaine turned around to face his boyfriend, ready to cover him in kisses.

Kurt smiled at him but his smile didn't reach his eyes, which immediately alarmed Blaine.

"I think we should talk," Kurt said quietly.

"About what?"

"About what happened…I'm so sorry."

Blaine pushed the blanket off him and sat down, looking around the room for his underwear.

"Blaine," Kurt hesitantly put a hand on his shoulder. "Lets take a shower since we're kind of gross and then we can talk."

"I wanna go home. We can talk another time."

"Blaine, please."

"No," Blaine shook his head vehemently, still avoiding Kurt's sight. "Believe it or not, what happened meant something to me and having you regret it a few hours after we did that? I don't think I can handle it right now. We can break up tomorrow."

"I don't want us to break up. Blaine, please!" Kurt grabbed Blaine's arm and forced him to turn around. "I do NOT want to break up with you!"

"Then what's wrong?"

"Nothing!"

"You said you're sorry that we had sex, Kurt. Something is terribly wrong if you ask me!"

"Can I at least explain myself before you dump me?"

"God, I don't wanna dump you! I just don't know what's going on!"

"That's why I want to talk, Blaine."

"It's getting late. I should probably go home. We can talk in the morning, okay?"

"No. Stay here," Kurt pleaded. "Just text Sam that you won't be coming home tonight. Please, baby, please, don't leave. Let me explain." Kurt eyes were glassy and his grip on Blaine's arm was firm. They were still naked and Blaine did feel sticky and uncomfortable. He desperately needed a shower. And Kurt. He needed Kurt but he wasn't sure where the night would take them from here. He believed that the morning was wiser than the evening. Seeing Kurt so distressed and utterly sad made him change his mind though.

"Go take a shower and I'll let Sam know." Kurt exhaled a shuddered breath at his words.

"Thank you. Thank you so much."

Kurt showered very quickly, leaving the bathroom only in a towel around his waist. He gave Blaine instructions where he could find anything he might need and then disappeared in his bedroom. Blaine found him there fifteen minutes later, looking into his closet, still half naked.

"I don't have any suitable pajamas," he said when Blaine entered the room. "Everything I have is too big for you."

Blaine slowly walked to him and took his hand. "You don't want to break up, right?"

"No, I don't." Kurt confirmed.

"We already slept naked on the couch, I think we can manage without pajamas." Blaine tugged his boyfriend to bed and slid under covers, motioning to Kurt to join him. Kurt carefully did so, keeping his distance from Blaine and waiting for Blaine to set the boundaries. Blaine lay on his side and looked at him expectantly.

"Can you tell me what's going on?"

"You deserved better than that…"

"Better than what?"

"Hurried sex on the couch…"

"Is it how you see what happened between us?"

"I'm not very good at talking about my feelings and emotional stuff...I grew up with my dad and we never really talked about things until I was like sixteen. I'm not used to...I don't even know how to start." Kurt sighed heavily, reaching for Blaine's hand in need of support. Blaine squeezed his hand encouragingly and smiled at him.

"I don't regret what happened, Kurt."

"I was different back in Ohio, you know," Kurt started. "Innocent and probably a lot more clueless than necessary. I loved romance and the mere thought of sex repulsed me. I dreamt of hand holding and cuddling, kissing under the stars and hugging. It was my idea of romance and what I imagined my relationship would be like. When my dad gave me the sex talk, I literally put fingers in my ears. He had to force me into listening. It was a great speech. He told me how I matter and that I shouldn't throw myself around. I carried his words with me and they kind of made my adaptation process in New York more complicated. After I started at Vogue, I got hit on regularly and it was so strange for me. No one took any interest in me in Lima, except my bully, who kissed me in a locker room and threatened my life."

"What?!"

"That's a story for another time." Kurt dismissed it and continued. "So I started dating but it never went very far because mostly they just wanted to go out and hook up and I wasn't interested in that. When Ben came around, things changed. We kind of clicked and he really cared about me and I lost my virginity to him on our two month anniversary. We didn't plan on it. It just happened. I can't say I regret that. I didn't love him though. We broke up and I dated a few guys after. This time around, I hooked up with them, which I'm not proud of. I went with the crowd and it wasn't very smart of me. Everybody does that in college, so why not me? It was fun, no strings attached, no whiny boyfriend and it seemed to be enough. Until Elliot found Ted. He was so smitten by him...From the beginning they had what I always wanted to have. I decided, then, that I would find my romance. When you asked me out for coffee, I knew it was my chance. You were nothing like other guys and I already had the biggest crush on you. I promised myself not to screw this up. What we have is so precious to me, Blaine. The way we started, just hand holding and kisses on the cheek before we progressed to more, it was what I always dreamt of. I like that we went one step at a time and I feel like I failed today. I...I thought of roses and candles for our first time together. I still can't believe I let my hormones and your hotness win over my brain. You are not a hook up, Blaine. You deserve so much better…" Blaine leaned forward and kissed Kurt's lips sweetly, trying to erase his discomfort.

"Maybe we rushed into it but we've been together for three months, Kurt. It's no surprise it happened. I don't need roses or candles but if it's something you like to have, then we can have it. We've just started, Kurt. We haven't tried anything yet. We can do whatever you want. As long as you tell me. I mean, we both obviously made a mistake because we didn't communicate things properly. I was wondering what was wrong and why you kept stopping to cool down but I was afraid to ask."

"You don't have to be afraid to ask anything, Blaine. I'm used to acting instead of talking so sometimes I'm going to just assume that you know why I'm doing what I'm doing. If there is something you need to know, you have to ask directly."

"Okay," Blaine said thoughtfully. "What would you like to do next? I mean, when it comes to intimacy...Just because we had sex tonight, it doesn't mean we can't wait a bit longer to do it again. I won't force you into anything you aren't comfortable with."

"I wanna learn your body," Kurt told him as his fingers slowly disentangled from Blaine's. He ran his hand over Blaine's shoulder and down his arm before he placed it on Blaine's waist, stroking his boyfriend's smooth skin with his thumb. "I wanna know what you like and don't like, what your weak spots are and how you respond to my hands and lips on you...I wanna take time in memorizing you. You matter Blaine and I matter, too...our relationship matters and I don't want to skip anything. You make my old dreams about romance come true. With you I can finally have that and I know we are not sixteen anymore, nor are we each other's first but this is new to me. I've never felt like this and I just have to make sure I won't do anything that would harm us. You are so sweet and caring and you deserve nothing less than the best. And it's not just about sex. Everything. You deserve the best of everything."

Blaine was mesmerized with the man laying next to him. Kurt was looking him in the eyes, deadly serious, his face beautiful and his sight so so honest. Blaine raised his hand to caress Kurt's cheek, once again overwhelmed with the strength of emotions towards Kurt.

"You deserve the best of everything, too."

"I've already got you, Blaine. There is nothing better in this world for me." Blaine shot a big toothy smile at him which was reciprocated immediately with a smile just as bright as Blaine's was that Blaine decided to throw all caution to the wind.

"I love you, Kurt." The words left his mouth easily, as it was the most natural thing to say and after the talk they just had, he wasn't surprised when Kurt's response came in no time, without missing a beat.

"I love you, too."


	10. Christmas at Andersons

_Blaine never was too fond of tacky Christmas cards but the one Kurt made him a part of for their first Christmas together was something special. They took a selfie one day while walking through the park in the snow. It was nice and sweet as it was but Kurt tastefully edited it on his laptop and wrote Merry Christmas right above their heads, claiming that they were going to send it to their friends and families. The card was a success and Blaine had it all over his apartment, keeping one piece of it for their scrapbook after Christmas. He was very surprised to see it on his parent's fridge when he came home for the holidays that year. As far as he was concerned, they hadn't had anything on the fridge since Blaine stopped drawing crayon pictures…_

The Christmas went great at first. He finally got the chance to spend some time with his parents which was probably the best Christmas gift he received this year. He had to admit that Cooper's presence could make the holiday even more special but he wasn't going to dwell on it. He would take whatever he was given and enjoy it while it lasted. Which, of course wasn't that long. The whole seven days he was supposed to be at home with his mom and dad shortened into just two. He was promised family time but he was left alone the day after Christmas. As much as his parents were apologetic, he couldn't bring himself to believe them that there wasn't anything to be done about their work schedules.

Being alone in a big house sucked. When he woke up in the morning, his parents were already gone and they didn't come back until after seven in the evening. Blaine did his best to kill the time with watching Christmas movies but it got boring after five hours. He tried to contact his old friends from high school but none of them were in Westerville for the holidays and Kurt had his own plans so he didn't want to bother him. He wished he was in New York already. His parents probably wouldn't even notice that he was gone since they were busy with a big case and charity planning.

The next day was even slower than the previous one. By noon he was utterly desperate for some action so he turned their basement upside down in an attempt to find his old ice skates. When he came back to the living room, his phone was bouncing on the coffee table, screaming for attention.

"Hello?" He picked the device up, not looking at the display who was calling.

"Hi baby!" Kurt's cheerful voice echoed in the speaker. "What are you doing? I've been trying to reach you for a while."

"Oh, hi! I was in our basement looking for my ice skates. I didn't have my phone on me."

"So I assume you're busy…" Kurt noted, hiding a disappointment.

"Not really. I'm just trying to kill some time before my parents come back from work. How is your shopping trip with girls?"

"I didn't go with them. I have something more important to do."

"But you were looking forward to it…"

"Well, I changed my mind. Do you think your parents could spare you for dinner tonight?"

"What? Why?"

"My dad wants to meet you so I was thinking that maybe you could come to Lima and stay the night. We can go ice skating tomorrow with my friends. What do you say?"

"Your dad wants to meet me?"

"Yeah. Carol is already planning the menu. Please, don't say no."

"O-Okay." Blaine said hesitantly. "I have to let my parents know though."

"Sure. Text me your adress and I'll pick you up."

"I can drive to Lima. You don't have to come for me."

"Too late, baby. I just crossed into Westerville. Send me the adress and I'll be with you soon, okay?"

"You what?!"

"Blaine, the address. Bye!" After those words, the line went dead.

Blaine sent a message with his address to Kurt before calling his mom. He was a bit uncertain about the whole situation. He went outside to wait for his boyfriend but mostly he just needed the fresh air to clear his thoughts.

He was standing in front of his house for fifteen minutes when Kurt parked his car on the street. He could see his boyfriend's bright smile as he hurried to hug him.

"I missed you so much!" Kurt murmured into Blaine's shoulder, holding him tightly in his arms. "I missed you, too." Blaine breathed and shuddered. The cold was really getting under his skin since he was wearing just his sweater without a coat or scarf.

"Let's go inside." Kurt ordered and took his hand, letting Blaine lead him to the entrance. "You didn't have to wait for me outside, silly."

"I didn't want you to miss my house."

"Where is the kitchen? I'm gonna make you some hot tea. You go and pack your things and we can go."

"About that," Blaine started reluctantly and Kurt immediately sensed a problem. "My mom was very thrilled when I called her and she asked if we could stay here tonight so you could meet my parents and then go to Lima tomorrow morning...I said your family is expecting us but you know, it's very hard to say no to my mom. She's even going to make my dad come home from work earlier so we won't eat so late..."

"Okay." Kurt nodded and took his shoes off before going further into the house. "Now, show me your kitchen!"

"Okay? Just like that?" Kurt looked at Blaine funny. He came up to him and wrapped his arms around his shoulders, kissing his lips sweetly.

"Just like that. I mean, it makes sense since I'm already here. You'll have to give me something to sleep in and clean underwear in the morning. Now, I'm gonna make you tea and then I'll call my dad about the change in our plans."

They ended up making hot chocolate instead of tea and then they seated themselves on the big sofa in the living room, just beside the fireplace. Blaine absently ran his hand up and down Kurt's arm while Kurt's fingers were playing with his loose curls.

"Blaine?" Kurt asked timidly. "Can I ask one question?"

"Hmmm…"

"We've never talked about it but I'd like to know what I'm up against tonight."

"Up against?"

"Well, I know you were in a relationship before. But you never gave me any details. Did your parents meet your ex? Did they like him? Was he a precious sweetheart? How hard it will be to convince them that I'm better than him?" Blaine pulled away from his spot on Kurt's chest to look him in the eyes. The confident, always in control Kurt was biting his lower lip and Blaine could swear there was distress in his features.

"Kurt, are you nervous?"

"A little." Kurt admitted quietly. "My dad never really liked my ex so you scored some good points just for not being him and then you're your father's son. And let's not forget that you are the boy who makes me happier than I've ever been. My parents worship you and they haven't even met you. I want your parents to like me, too."

"They will. I promise."

"It would really help if your ex-boyfriend was an asshole."

"He wasn't." Blaine replied and Kurt sighed heavily. "We were high school sweethearts. We got together halfway through our sophomore year and stayed together until we left for college. Our break up was a mutual decision because we didn't want to let the distance get between us. He was accepted to UCLA and I was going to NYADA. It was great while it lasted but in the end, neither of us was willing to compromise our dreams for the other one. So we split. My family knew him, they loved him but they were happy when we decided to follow our dreams instead of following each other."

"Do you regret not trying to work it out?"

"No. He was my first love but they aren't made to last, are they? He is happy where he is and I'm happy in New York. Continuing our relationship and constantly missing on each other would make us sad and it would prevent us from gaining new experiences. We did the right, mature thing and I'm proud of it."

"What if he changes his mind?"

"He won't. But even if he did, it wouldn't mean anything. I'm taken. I'm with you. I love  _you_ now." Kurt moved forward and pressed his lips against Blaine's firmly. He opened his mouth a little, his tongue slipping out to meet Blaine's as his boyfriend surrendered to him and let Kurt kiss him breathless. Blaine felt the tension in Kurt's body slowly disappear with every kiss they exchanged. It was the first time Kurt showed any insecurities around him and Blaine hoped he eased his mind through the affection they were expressing with their bodies.

* * *

The dinner was great. Kurt impressed Blaine's parents with his manners and intelligence and Blaine was so proud to have him by his side. Everything went smoothly over dessert in the living room as they shared their views on politics and Blaine was wondering if it wasn't too perfect to last like everything else when it came to his family.

"I guess I'm going to call it a night." His mom said around ten o'clock and stood up from the armchair she was sitting in. "Kurt, I'll prepare the guest room for you."

"Mom, it's not necessary. Kurt can sleep in my room."

"Sweetie, Kurt is our guest tonight and he is going to have his own room."

"But," Blaine tried to object.

"No buts. Come on, you're gonna help me get the blankets from the closet." Blaine huffed, not happy about their sleeping arrangements at all. He leaned closer to Kurt and whispered  _I'm sorry_ to his ear so no one would hear. Kurt just smiled and kissed his cheek.

"It's okay, baby." He whispered back.

"Goodnight, Kurt."

"Goodnight, Mrs. Anderson. See you in the morning." Kurt watched his boyfriend and his mother go upstairs, completely forgetting about Mr. Anderson still being in the room. Blaine's father poured himself a glass of whiskey and turned around from the alcohol cabinet to face Kurt.

"Would you like one?" A sudden voice startled Kurt.

"Oh, no. Thank you."

"Would you prefer wine? Or beer? I know your father never drinks anything but beer."

"I'm fine. Thank you." Kurt declined the offer politely again. The awkward silence surrounded them and Kurt couldn't miss how Blaine's father started to play with his glass, the same way his son did everytime he was anxious.

"I'm glad you stayed for dinner tonight." The older Anderson stated. "Blaine talks about you very fondly and I'm happy we got the chance to finally meet you."

"Pleasure was all mine. It just seemed fair to be introduced to you since Blaine is meeting my parents, too."

"I have to thank you for taking him away from here. I know he expected more from his break and I really want him to enjoy it instead of sitting here and waiting for us to come home. Our work schedule is very busy and some things came up right before Christmas that need our attention."

"Can I be honest with you?"

"Sure."

"Your son needs your attention as well."

"Blaine understands…"

"Of course he does, because he is amazing like that. It doesn't mean he likes it. Sorry, if I'm overstepping but he would give anything for a day spent with you and your wife."

"I'm doing this for his future. I'm trying to make this a better place to live for him. I want him to be safe when he comes home. He knows that."

"I really appreciate what you do for the gay community in Ohio. You've made a difference but with all the respect I have for your work, there is a long way to go until we'll be treated equally. By putting so much effort in making Blaine's future bright, you're missing important parts of his present. One free day isn't going to cost you a case. You are the best civil rights attorney in Ohio. Hell, you are one of the best in the country! You can afford to spend some time with your son without it having an effect on your job."

"It's not that easy, Kurt."

"Everything is as easy or as difficult as we make it."

"You're just like your father. Determined, adamant and stubborn." Mr. Anderson remarked and Kurt nodded.

"Yes, I'm exactly like my father. I would fight tooth and nail to make people I love happy. I love your son, Mr. Anderson. And I'm going to do everything to make him happy. But however much I'll try, there'll still be something missing and it's you and your actual presence in his life. He doesn't need much and he isn't going to ask for it. I just thought you should know. I know you are a reasonable man so I'm not afraid that you're going to despise me now just because I ran my big mouth. We both want the same thing for him."

"I'm not going to despise you for caring about my son. I would appreciate if you stayed out of our family business, though. There is a lot you don't know and your harsh words aren't gonna help anyone."

"I can't promise anything. I'm sorry in advance for everything I may say in the future that might be offensive. I plan to be around for a long time and I tend to be very outspoken when it comes to things close to my heart." Mr. Anderson observed his son's boyfriend with a serious face. Kurt didn't avoid the eye contact. He sat there with his head up and his back straight, keeping his ground.

"How close is Blaine to your heart?" Blaine's father asked after while.

"He is right in the center of it."

"Then I guess I can say, I accept your apology for your possible future rudeness." They both broke into a smile and before one of them had a chance to say something more, Blaine walked into the room.

Mr. Anderson drank the rest of his drink and said goodnight to them, leaving two young lovers alone.

"We should go to sleep." Kurt suggested. "Puck is throwing a party tomorrow night. We'll need to be well rested."

"Okay." Blaine laced their fingers as they made their way upstairs to their respective rooms.

"I'm so sorry she forced you to sleep in a guest room."

"Don't worry about it. I fought with my dad for hours until he agreed to let you sleep in my bed."

"You fought with your dad about me?"

"Yeah. I won. I get to hold you in my arms tomorrow night. We can manage to be apart for tonight. Especially, if it's your mother's request. I respect your parents' wishes." Blaine sneaked his arm around Kurt's waist to bring him closer, kissing him tenderly.

"I love you so much, Kurt."

"I love you, too." Kurt sealed his words with another sweet kiss and then stepped out of Blaine's embrace and into his room for the night. Blaine stayed in the hallway until the door on Kurt's room was closed. He waited for a moment whether Kurt wouldn't change his mind after all and come to sleep to his room but nothing like that happened. His boyfriend stayed the night in their guest room, meeting Blaine with a cup of coffee in the kitchen the next morning.

To this day, Blaine never told anyone about the conversation between Kurt and his dad that he accidentally witnessed the day his boyfriend met his parents.


	11. Jersey

_A football jersey was something Blaine had never thought he would see Kurt wearing. The first time he put it on, Blaine took a picture of him, just in case it would never happen again. And he also needed proof of it. Blaine devoted a whole page in their scrapbook to Kurt dressed in a New York Giants jersey. As he was looking at it now, his mind immediately jumped on the day when Kurt voluntary put that monstrosity - as he liked to call it - on himself…_

The first NFL game Blaine was going to see didn't go exactly the way he planned it. He was in New York for a year and a half when he finally bought the tickets to see the Giants. He and Sam were big fans of football and they never missed a game on TV, always talking about how they should go to see it live. One day, they turned the words into action and Blaine couldn't wait to experience the game atmosphere right in MetLife Stadium.

However, not three hours before the kick-off he started to worry. Sam hadn't come home from work yet and he hadn't heard a word from him since they parted ways that morning. He tried to call him several times but there was no response. He sat nervously on the chair in the kitchen, fully clothed and prepared to go, wondering what might have happened to his best friend. When his phone signaled an incoming text, he dared to hope that it was Sam telling him to meet him in front of the stadium. Indeed, it was Sam. But not with good news.

_Dude, I'm so sorry. This is taking forever. The photographer is still complaining about something. We haven't done half of the things we were supposed to do today. I won't be able to go to the game. - Sam_

Blaine defeatedly put his phone back on the table. Once again, the TV had to be enough. He stood up and went through their kitchen cabinets to find out how much popcorn and junk food was there for him to enjoy the game from his home properly. Kurt would probably kill him if he saw what Blaine put on the coffee table just for himself.

The moment Kurt appeared on his mind, his phone started ringing.

"Hi, baby!" Kurt's trademark greeting made him feel a bit better. Kurt always made him feel better.

"Hi."

"Are you there yet?"

"No."

"No? I thought you would camp in front of the stadium from early afternoon with the way you were so excited about it." Kurt chuckled. "Anyway, I'm about to leave and my phone is on the charger so I won't be reachable tonight. But don't hesitate to live text me whatever is happening on the field. I'll get to it as soon as I'm back from the theater, okay?"

"It's okay. We're not going."

"What?! What the hell happened?"

"Sam is still at work. He won't be able to make it."

"Oh, baby. I'm so sorry. Can't you take someone else?"

"I don't really have many friends...I don't know who to ask...your friends are going with you and besides Sam, there is no one I'm more than an acquaintance with…"

"There is really no chance he's gonna make it?" Kurt asked sadly.

"Apparently not. Don't worry about it. Go and enjoy The Sound of Music, okay? Your friends are waiting for you. I'll just watch the game on TV."

"But…"

"Kurt," Blaine interrupted him firmly. "Go, and call me when you get back. Love you."

"I love you, too." Blaine quickly ended the call before Kurt managed to say something else. He lay down on the couch and flipped through TV channels, making himself busy before the game started. He set his interest into a World War II documentary and almost jumped out of his skin thirty minutes later when he heard the knock on his door. The person standing behind it was the last one he expected to see.

"Kurt? What are you doing here?"

"We're going to see the game. Come on, we don't have much time. It'll take over hour to get there. Hurry up."

"We what?!"

Kurt impatiently stepped into the apartment and threw Blaine's Giants jersey at him from where it was discarded on the sofa.

"Put it on so we can go. And give me Sam's. If I'm gonna do this, I have to dress properly."

"Kurt, you're supposed to have dinner with your friends before seeing the show."

"And you are supposed to be on the way to MetLife stadium."

"You don't have to do this."

"I know I don't have to, but I want to. However, if I'm going to do this, I'm going to do it right. Where is Sam's jersey?" Kurt pointed to Blaine's jersey and Blaine gave up. Kurt had a determined look in his eyes, the one that meant he wasn't going to change his mind. Blaine went to Sam's room and came back with the jersey his boyfriend demanded.

"Okay, just ignore how ridiculous I look right now. I'll dress all sexy and hot tomorrow for you." Kurt said as he put the jersey on. "Thank God we are wearing coats over this."

"No, wait!" Blaine caught his hand and took the coat from him. He grabbed his phone and snapped the photo of him.

"Blaine!" Kurt objected but it was too late. "You're gonna delete it!"

"Not a chance." Blaine laughed and gave him back his coat. "You sure you wanna go? You can still catch the show…"

"I can catch the show anytime I want. Lets go. We don't want to miss the kick off."

* * *

"What's wrong?" Kurt asked Blaine after the second quarter while they were eating their hot dogs - which Blaine might or might not have not captured on his phone as well.

"Nothing. Why?"

"Because you've spent more time watching me than the game so far!" Blaine blushed when he realized he was caught. He couldn't help it. Kurt was so into game that one might think football was his life. He was cheering and booing, jumping from his seat and yelling with other fans as if it was second nature.

"I didn't know you were such a fan. You never watched a game with me and Sam. Until today I was convinced you had no idea about rules!"

"I'm not a fan."

"You look like one right now."

"That's the point, isn't it? We came here to enjoy the game, right?"

"Yeah."

"Then enjoy the game and stop staring at me!" Kurt nudged his shoulder and smiled at him.

"I just don't understand."

"Don't understand what?"

"If you aren't a fan, why are you here with me?"

"Because you wouldn't go alone," Kurt shrugged his shoulders. "I know big crowds make you uncomfortable and I didn't want you to miss the opportunity to see this. It's a play off game, after all. My dad and Finn would never forgive you for not going and, trust me, you don't want to get on their bad side."

"I could go another time…"

"But you already had tickets, Blaine. Why are we even talking about this? I'm here with you because I wanted to come. What's so hard to understand?"

"You don't like football. Yet you are acting like it's the best thing ever. It's just...I don't know, weird. I feel like I ruined your evening." Kurt took his hand in his and squeezed it, tugging at it until Blaine raised his eyes from the ground and looked at him.

"I love being here with you. My evening would have been ruined if I knew you were home alone watching the game on TV when you could have been here. I don't really care about football but I do care about you, baby. Had I gone to the theater, I would have thought of you not having the great evening you were supposed to have the whole time. I can see The Sound of Music next week. It's not a big deal for me. But this game is a big deal for you. You barely do anything to spoil yourself. So please, enjoy the rest of the game, okay?" Blaine nodded wordlessly, accepting Kurt's kiss on the cheek.

"I expect you to have fun and cheer from now on. And shout  _fuck you_  to the referee if you don't like his decision." Kurt grinned at him widely and Blaine had to laugh. He looked around and when he was sure no one was paying any attention to them, he pressed his lips against Kurt's briefly.

"Thank you. You are the best boyfriend ever."

"You're welcome," Kurt responded and then leaned to whisper into his boyfriend's ear. "I'm gonna buy my own jersey after the game is over since you seem to like it so much."

"Really?" Blaine beamed at him, already imagining Kurt wearing the jersey around his home.

"Hmmm…" Kurt hummed and bit his lip innocently. "If you enjoy the rest of the game the way I want you to, I might leave it on while you fuck me tonight."

"Shit, Kurt!" Blaine whined. "How am I supposed to concentrate on the game when you put that image in my mind?"

"Concentrate or  _that image_  would be the only thing you'll have tonight."

Needless to say, Blaine could never look at Kurt in that Giants jersey without thinking of him spread on his bed under Blaine's body, requesting  _deeper, harder, faster_  which led to the jersey being tossed with the sheets into a laundry basket.


	12. Combat class midterm

_Going through their scrapbook wasn't the brightest idea, Blaine realized. But his ideas and actions weren't the brightest the whole day so it was no surprise. Looking at the photos and thinking of memories that were connected with them was making him feel more and more guilty about how he snapped at Kurt. He shouldn't have done that. Kurt did nothing wrong and Blaine let himself take it all out on him without a valid reason. Had Kurt known, he would have done everything in his power to make Blaine feel better. Ever since Kurt had helped him with his troubles in combat class, Blaine knew his boyfriend would always have his back…_

Blaine's sophomore year at NYADA was much better than his first year of college. He had Kurt and thanks to him he gained more friends. His social life was exceeding and his days weren't filled only with studying. He still did great. He was at the top of his class, a multitalent who worked hard but, admittedly, not as hard as the previous year.

When spring semester's midterms rolled out, he was pretty confident in passing them. He and Kurt limited the time they spent together for two weeks so they could focus on their exams. Everything went smoothly. Until it didn't.

Kurt developed a habit of texting Blaine every morning after he woke up and every evening before he went to sleep. Sometimes he sent just a kissy face or two words saying good morning or good night, but Blaine cherished and saved them all. While preparing for midterms, Blaine was receiving texts regularly throughout the day, be it an announcement of Kurt's frustration from studying or something sweet Kurt had just come up with and absolutely had to let Blaine know, Blaine's inbox was spammed with messages from his boyfriend.

When midterms were over, Kurt expected them to get back to their routine but Blaine was always rushing somewhere, not having time for him at all. Kurt still texted him several times a day, trying to be understanding and patient, but Blaine knew his boyfriend was not happy about it.

Blaine was considering whether to come clean to Kurt or not, but in the end he decided to keep his secret for himself before things were fixed. He did his best to avoid Kurt at school, which was easy since he knew Kurt's schedule by heart. He was aware that Kurt would find him sooner or later because he knew Blaine's schedule by heart as well, but a little time he could buy was still better than none.

Kurt's last midterm was on Friday and he called Blaine as soon as he got out of school to make plans for the evening and whole weekend. Blaine politely declined, claiming he was tired and in need of a good rest. He persuaded Kurt to go ahead and join his classmates on their trip to Atlantic City during weekend and even though Kurt didn't want to go, Blaine basically forced him to do it. Blaine's luck in keeping his distance from Kurt carried on from Monday to Wednesday the following week, but on Thursday he was so exhausted that he didn't pay enough attention to where he was going and ended up right in front of his boyfriend.

"Blaine!" Kurt grabbed him by his arm and dragged him into a secluded corner of the school, observing him intently. "What the hell is going on? You look awful!"

"Nice to see you, too, Kurt." Blaine snickered and looked around, already planning his escape. Kurt took in his appearance, circles under his eyes, bruises on his arms and a cut on his cheek.

"Blaine, what the fuck happened to you?"

"Nothing. I'm fine." Blaine said softly. "I need to go to the gym but I'll call you when I get home, okay?"

"No way!" Kurt exclaimed, earning a few glances from passers by. "We are leaving, now!" He pushed him into the direction of the exit and Blaine was so tired that he didn't even protest this time. Kurt was animatedly talking all the way to the subway station but Blaine didn't really pay any attention to him. His body was screaming at him from pain and tiredness, his mind hazy, but he knew Kurt was scolding him as he would a five year old.

They came to Kurt's apartment not thirty minutes later and Blaine fell down on the couch, not really hiding his weariness anymore. Kurt sat down next to him and put a hand on his shoulder while cupping his cheek with the other one to make him look at him.

"Baby, what's going on? I know you've been spending time in the gym for days now. Every time I came to your apartment in the last few days, Sam told me you weren't home. In the morning, during the day, in the evening. You're injured and you look like you haven't slept in days. And above all of that you are avoiding me. I don't understand what's going on with you, Blaine, but I really worry about you. Please, tell me what's wrong so we can fix it."

"I'll fix it, Kurt. Just few more days and it'll be over. I can fix it. And then everything will be like it used to. I promise."

"What are you fixing, Blaine? How can you fix something when you can barely stand on your own two feet?"

"Kurt, please, don't make me do this. It's bad enough for me as it is…"

"I just wanna help, Blaine. It's killing me to see you like this. It's killing me not to be with you. I miss you like crazy, baby. And apparently you're going through a rough time and you won't let me in. Why?" Kurt's eyes were digging holes right into his soul and there was no strength left in Blaine to resist.

"I didn't want you to see me like this...I didn't want you to see failure." Blaine whispered and Kurt gaped at him.

"What? You're not a fail-"

"I didn't pass my Stage Combat midterm." Blaine interrupted him.

"That's impossible! You were the best one in there! I saw you!"

"I didn't pass, along with like half of the others students in the class. I don't know what happened, Kurt. I knew every piece of choreography we did so far. I know how to use those weapons. I might not have put as much effort into school as I did last year but I was ready. This has never happened to me. I've never failed anything…"

"How come you didn't pass then?"

"I don't know! I showed him everything he wanted to see and then he flunked me without a reason. He told me I have one more try next Tuesday. If I don't pass, I'll have to drop the class."

"You can't drop Combat class, you are a theater major. Stage combat class is mandatory! You won't be able to graduate!"

"I can repeat it next year."

"But there are other classes that you can't take unless you have Stage Combat finished. It would keep you behind and you wouldn't be able to graduate on time!"

"I know, okay? I know that but what can I do? I didn't pass, Kurt!"

"There's something fishy about it."

"He offered to give me private lessons to get ready for the repeat…" Blaine admitted quietly.

"Are you kidding me?"

"I wish I was…"

"Blaine, you have to complain!"

"About what?"

"You know what this is about, Blaine! He does have the reputation as quite a perv! Shit! You should have signed for Liam's Combat class. This was a mistake."

"I can't just go and complain that my teacher hit on me. I have no proof. I just have to make sure I pass this time."

"It might be a problem. He didn't get what he wanted out of this, so he might be vindictive…We should tell Madame Tibideaux."

"No," Blaine shook his head. "No telling anyone, Kurt. I'll get through it on my own."

"But - "

"No! It won't help a thing! I'm not going to complain! I'm gonna keep perfecting the routines so he won't have any option but to let me pass!"

"You are exhausting yourself, Blaine! You have bruises and cuts! How is that helping?"

"I need to get it done, Kurt. I have to go back to NYADA's gym." Blaine stood up and stumbled but, fortunately, Kurt's arms were there to catch him.

"You're not going anywhere. We'll take the afternoon off and we are skipping tomorrow as well. You need to rest and I'm gonna personally supervise it. We can go to gym this weekend but you are not allowed to leave this apartment until I say so."

"Kurt - "

"Now, you're gonna take a bath. It'll help relax your muscles. I'll make you a bubble bath and you are not leaving the bathroom until the water is cold! Then we'll eat something and you'll lay down. We can watch TV or sleep but you're going to be in a horizontal position for the rest of the day!"

"Kurt - "

"I'm not finished! Next time don't even try to keep something like this from me. I'll find out one way or another, are we clear? No matter what you do, whether it is your fault or not, I'm always, ALWAYS, here for you. You will never be a failure to me. You don't have to be ashamed around me. All I need you to  _be_ is to be yourself and honest with me." Blaine nodded because it was all he could do. He finally gave up and let the tears fall down. He was so tired of everything. His teacher had been weird since the beginning of the semester and there were some inappropriate comments towards him now and then but Blaine never thought not acknowledging them would get him into trouble.

"Oh, baby," Kurt said soothingly and wrapped his arms securely around him. "Everything is gonna be alright. I promise we'll get you through that stupid class unharmed and next year you will take Liam's Stage Combat 2, okay? You're gonna pass this year even if it kills me."

"I'm sorry I've been distant lately…"

"It's okay. I'm not mad at you. Just promise you will talk to me about everything that's bothering you from now on."

"I promise." Blaine murmured into Kurt's shoulder, holding him for dear life. "I promise I will. I love you."

"I love you, too." Kurt kissed his temple and slowly unwind himself from his boyfriend. "Come on, lets take the bath."

"Together?"

"Well, if you're not opposed the idea."

"I'm not! I would love that!"

* * *

Blaine was supposed to take the exam Tuesday morning. Kurt was waiting for him in front of the building, pacing from one side of the sidewalk to another. When Blaine appeared, Kurt could see he was not happy.

"Well? How did it go?"

"What have you done, Kurt?" Blaine asked angrily.

"Nothing! What are you talking about?"

"Nothing? So why were Madam Tibideaux and Liam monitoring the whole thing?"

"I," Kurt gulped and it was all Blaine needed.

"I can't believe it! I asked you not to say a thing!"

"I haven't told anyone! I swear!"

"But you have done something! I can tell just by looking at you right now!" Kurt sighed heavily and took Blaine's hand.

"Let's go somewhere less NYADA and more private."

They walked silently into the park situated a few blocks away from school. It was relatively empty since it was morning but Kurt still led them into a bench between trees, far away from the main part of the park.

"I haven't told anyone anything, Blaine. You didn't want me to. I wouldn't break your trust that way."

"Carmen and Liam told us that there was a complaint from a student and that's why they would be supervising. You have nothing to do with that?"

"I might have helped encourage a student to complain…" Kurt conceded. "I went through NYADA unofficial blogs while you were sleeping on Thursday. I found out that Andrew didn't pass as well and we all know how suggestible he is. He thought James was unfair to him all semester and he sent a few innuendos at him too so I just put some ideas into his mind...I pointed out how James was already known as a teacher who doesn't hesitate in pursuing students and that if he thinks his behavior is inappropriate, he should tell someone. I also told him what a sweetheart Carmen is and how she always cares about the students' well being...I knew he would go to her. That bastard needs to be taken down, Blaine. I can't have you in his class!"

"Too bad because I am in his class!"

"You can ask Liam if he would take you. I know he would give anything to have you as a student. He's great. I love his classes. You will too."

"I know. He came to me after and offered me a spot for the rest of the semester but I declined."

"Why?!"

"I'm not a quitter. And if I was the only one who left the class, people would know I was the one complaining. I signed in for this class and I'm gonna finish it."

"If he tries anything on you, I swear - "

"He won't do anything, Kurt. He already has the faculty on his case. He'll be carefull and I'm pretty sure we'll pass the Combat class at the end of the year." Blaine put his head on Kurt's shoulder as Kurt laced their fingers together. "Thank you for going behind my back without actually going behind my back."

"I won't let anyone hurt you, Blaine. Not if I can do something about it."

"I love you."

"Love you, too, baby."


	13. Meet Cooper

_Kurt insisted on including their family members in their scrapbook. They didn't have many pictures with their families but, since a few of them were very nice, Kurt made an honorary page for them. Blaine looked at the photo of him and his brother, hugging at the airport when Cooper was leaving after his short trip to NYC. Things with Cooper were always tough, but since Kurt came into his life, they got a bit better. Everything got better with Kurt…_

When Cooper first visited Blaine in New York, Blaine was almost finished with his second year at NYADA. Blaine couldn't wait for his big brother to come, he even booked a gig at Callbacks so his brother could see him play. It wasn't a big venue, and Blaine did perform at much more important events but, still, a family member was coming and he finally had a chance to showcase himself. Who cares if it was in the karaoke bar.

Kurt and Blaine picked Cooper up at the airport Thursday evening. Cooper, true to himself, started to talk about his life and job in LA and he didn't stop until he went to sleep. It didn't surprise Blaine, as he was used to his brother's  _I need to be a center of the universe_  antics, but his boyfriend wasn't very pleased with it. Regardless, Kurt was the epitome of a polite and very friendly person, even though Blaine could tell Cooper was driving him crazy.

They went sightseeing on Friday, which wasn't as fun as Blaine expected initially. Cooper found a fault on every single thing they showed him, comparing it to things that could be seen in LA (that were better, nicer, bigger…). By the lunch time, it was obvious that Kurt was annoyed but he still kept his demeanor neutral. They called it a day around four in the afternoon so they could relax and Blaine had enough time to prepare for his performance.

For Kurt's sanity, Sam and couple of Kurt's friends were invited to join them at Callbacks. They had fun and everything went seemingly smoothly, partially because Cooper was more acceptable after two drinks and partially because Kurt was more accepting after two drinks.

They slept in on Saturday and met for coffee after lunch, deciding on making dinner together in Blaine's apartment. Cooper tried to lecture Kurt about new LA trends in healthy diet but Kurt shut him down very quickly and he was banished into the living room.

"Don't take this the wrong way, Baby, but your brother is real pain in the ass," Kurt told Blaine after Cooper made his dramatic exit from the kitchen. Blaine just laughed and shrugged his shoulders.

"He is a bit eccentric. That's why he always pulls the full focus and I'm left behind. I got used to it. It's not like he can help it."

"He could use a clash with reality." Kurt noted, half joking, half serious.

"He's too charming for that. No one is ever going to confront him."

"Why haven't you confronted him yet?"

"Because no matter what I say, he always takes something else from it. I don't like fighting. He's my brother and I think it's better this way. He wouldn't understand what I'm saying. He never did…"

"But he's hurting you, Blaine. With every stupid comment, he makes you sad. And I don't think it's his intention to be a douchebag, he just needs to be told that he should choose his words wisely because they can hurt others."

"The last time I saw him was Thanksgiving, Kurt. It's April now. The next time I'm gonna see him is probably Thanksgiving. We spend very little time together and I'd rather spend it without any conflict."

"I understand that, Blaine. I really do. It's just that you don't deserve that kind of treatment. He has found faults in everything and it's ridiculous. You put so much into making this trip enjoyable for him and he is acting like a brat."

"He'll be gone tomorrow and all will be forgotten. It's always like this."

"Doesn't make it right." Kurt mumbled and kissed Blaine's cheek. "So did you say he hates peas?"

"Kurt!" Blaine giggled and shook his head in disbelief. "You wouldn't!"

"No," Kurt assured him. "Of course I wouldn't. I mean, I definitely would but I know it would be just another thing he could pester you about and it's not worth it."

They finished the dinner, grilled chicken breasts with rice and salad, without peas, and sat behind the beautifully set table, but of course, it wouldn't be Cooper if he didn't find something wrong about it.

"Blaine, I'm pretty sure the napkin is supposed to be on the left side, not right. Didn't Dalton provide you with the proper table etiquette?"

"Just put the napkin on your lap, Coop." Blaine said, rolling his eyes.

"Well, don't give me that attitude, Squirt. You don't know where you gonna need this knowledge."

"I think I can manage."

"You should come to LA, little brother. There is so much to learn there. New York is not the right place for growth. People tend to blend in the crowd and become invisible. That's probably why you haven't made a name for yourself here yet. If you were in LA, you would at least make a debut in commercials or something."

"Can we just eat?" Blaine asked.

"We are eating, Blaine. Having a light conversation over the table is part of the proper etiquette. Again, didn't they teach you anything at Dalton? While I was there, we had to roleplay proper conversations! Anyway, what was I saying? Oh, yeah, big break. I saw the play you were part of this year. Mom gave me a DVD. I didn't know students record their poor attempts in being professional. Isn't it, like, a bit pathetic? No one is gonna believe that student production can equal to Broadway, right? You were good in it but you could do better. Sometimes you lacked the dramatic expression of your feelings. We've been through this, Blaine, if you want to be intense, you need to POINT! And there wasn't nearly enough screaming. You can't convince people you are in a rage if you don't yell...There are a few more notes I have. We can talk about them later, I don't wanna bore Kurt to death."

"Sure," Blaine said submissively, his eyes cast down. He wasn't eating, he just shifted his food on a plate. Even Kurt's hand on his knee didn't make him feel better. He wished he had the courage to say something to Cooper, to stand up for himself but it was hopeless in his case. What bothered Blaine the most was, that now he wasn't criticizing Blaine's choice of landmark or his too uncomfortable couch. This time it was his acting skills, something Blaine was working on hard and it hit home painfully.

"Blaine? Are you even listening to me?" Cooper's voice brought him back to reality.

"Huh?"

"Are you okay, baby?" Kurt asked, concerned.

"Yeah. I'm sorry. What were you saying?"

"How often do you play piano? Do you practise regularly?"

"I don't know. I play when I feel like it. Why?"

"You were flat on some notes yesterday at Callbacks. You won't be the best if you neglect practising…"

"Excuse me," Blaine stood up. "I need to use the restroom..." He was out of there in an instant, needing some time to breathe..

"What the hell are you doing?" He heard Kurt hiss as soon as he was around the corner.

"What?" Cooper asked and Blaine could sense the surprise and astonishment in his voice.

"Are you seriously that dumb? You are his guests and you behave like a jerk! Didn't they teach you how to be polite at Dalton?"

"What's gotten into you? Have I done something wrong?"

"Yes, you have! Since you got here, all you do is criticize him! Let me tell you something, Cooper. Blaine is the most amazing, most talented person I know. He works hard on his goals and the only reason he's not all over Broadway yet is that he wants to get his education first. He has managed to perform on several important occasions, which you blatantly ignored for one reason or another. Who are you to lecture him about his performing? I don't see any degree attached to your name and, excuse me if I'm wrong but besides a few national commercials, you aren't very successful in your acting career either. By the time Blaine is your age, he'll have a Tony. You might have money and your face might appear daily in American households but you are nothing in comparison to your brother. He is the sweetest, most humble and diligent man. You don't get to come here and talk bullshit. He's been looking forward to spending time with his brother for weeks! You are supposed to support him, not bring him down! Can't you see how sad he is? How his smile is mostly forced? How his eyes miss the glow? What kind of brother are you?"

"Wow!" Cooper raised his hand to stop Kurt's rant. "Dad told me not to get on your bad side and I didn't know what he meant at the time but I guess I just found out…"

"Everyone who hurts Blaine is on my bad side." Kurt stated and folded his arms on his chest.

"Well, I'm sorry. I didn't know I was doing something bad. I just want Blaine to be the best he can. He is very talented and he is gonna make it. I'm just trying to help, give him some advice I gained over the years…"

"There's a big difference between giving advice and picking holes in everything."

"Why didn't he tell me anything?"

"Really?" Kurt asked with a raised eyebrow. "It's Blaine we're talking about! He would do anything to avoid a conflict!"

"Yeah, you're right. I'm sorry. I'm gonna talk to him and apologize. Please, don't look at me like that. You are really scary when you're mad…"

"Be a good boy when Blaine comes back and you got yourself a deal!" Blaine forced himself to go back, hoping Kurt's words left some effect on his brother. He didn't anticipate anything big, just a little decrease in judging. What he got was much more. Cooper was overly friendly, praising everything to the point it started to be absurd and Blaine wondered how Kurt managed to do that. It was a welcome change, though.

Kurt said goodbye shortly after dinner, leaving Blaine and Cooper to enjoy their brother time and for the first time in years, Blaine did just that.

The hug at the airport was tight and long, and Cooper promised to make time for Blaine over the summer. Blaine didn't dare to hope it would be true but it was the thought that counted. He waved his brother off with tears shining in his eyes and sincere smile, holding Kurt's hand firmly. As soon as he got to hold on to Kurt, everything seemed to be brighter.

 


	14. Key

_There were many pictures of Kurt in their scrapbook but the one he loved the most was situated on his bedside table. It was taken on the day of their nine month anniversary. Kurt wasn't smiling in that one. He was looking at Blaine the way that always made his boyfriend shiver and that's why Blaine loved it so much. Every time he missed Kurt, he looked at the photo, and there he was, beautiful, with his eyes beaming with love for Blaine. It was a look solemnly reserved just for Blaine. It was something Blaine couldn't get enough of. And, as he so painfully realized, it was much more than any words of love could ever be…_

Cooking dinner for Kurt was always a challenge. Blaine knew Kurt wouldn't say a word against his cooking but with the cooking skills Kurt possessed, Blaine needed to show his boyfriend that he wasn't a lousy cook. Blaine usually went for something simple, so he wouldn't screw it up, but their nine months anniversary deserved something more.

He kicked Sam out of their apartment early in the morning to prepare it for their celebration. He cleaned it up the way it wasn't cleaned since they moved in and then he went to grocery shop. He bought everything he needed times two, in case something went wrong, and returned home satisfied and ready for his mission.

Everything went smoothly, the only problem that emerged was burnt bruschetta - he forgot to take them out of the oven, because Kurt called him and he spent more time talking to him than he should have. But except for this one inconvenience, everything was perfect. They would have bruschetta with mozzarella and tomatoes as an appetizer, rack of lamb with herbes de provence and roasted potatoes as a main course and mini molten chocolate cakes with mocha sauce as a desert.

Kurt loved it and Blaine was very proud of himself. Afterwards they sat down on the carpet in the living room, Kurt's back against the sofa and Blaine's back against Kurt's chest. They were talking and drinking white wine Kurt brought with him since Blaine wasn't brave enough to try and buy one himself. He wasn't legal yet, after all.

"Nine months...God, I still can't believe it." Kurt told him. "It feels like it was just yesterday when I was freaking out about why you asked me for coffee and then avoided me at all costs."

"I was convinced you were just being polite when you said yes." Blaine chuckled and Kurt kissed his shoulder, tightening his grip on his waist.

"Well, I wasn't. I was internally squealing like a schoolgirl when you did. I was surprised I was able to keep my cool."

"I'm so glad you took it into your hands and brought me coffee. I wouldn't have gone with it."

"I kind of figured that out. That's why I decided to come to you."

"Hmmm...It was a great decision." Blaine announced and turned his head to kiss him.

"You taste like chocolate and wine." Kurt whispered when they pulled apart. His fingers played with Blaine's curls and Blaine just smiled at him. He was content and happy, and he didn't need anything more. He could imagine spending his life like this. The thought scared him a bit. They were young, and they hadn't been together for too long, but Blaine was so in love he couldn't bear the idea of not having Kurt in his life.

"The first time I saw you, you were at your freshmen orientation. We'd already heard all about a guy who got accepted right after audition and we all were curious who it was. We went to look at freshmen and took bets about who was the mysterious man. I spotted you immediately. You were so different from everyone else...dressed in tight pants, with a polo shirt and bowtie, hair gelled...You were so cute and dreamy. And kind of lost, not approaching anybody but when someone came to talk to you, you were very friendly and smiley. Even from afar I could see how charisma was radiating from you. I was sure it was you who charmed Carmen Tibideaux. Everybody laughed at me. But as it turned out, I was right."

"I already knew who you were. At my freshmen orientation, I didn't really take in what was going on around me. I remember how Sam asked me what it was like and I didn't have an answer for it. Like... I honestly didn't know what was going on there. The first time I saw you was in the NYADA cafe the first week of school. You were there, holding hands with Ben. It didn't surprise me that you were taken. You were the most handsome guy on campus."

"Hmmm...So that's how it is. You're in this relationship just for my looks..." Kurt teased him and Blaine shook his head.

"No, I'm in this relationship because I love you."

"I love you, too, Blaine. So much." Blaine tilted his head, putting his hand behind Kurt's neck to bring him in for another kiss. Kurt let him take control, he didn't push for more. He allowed Blaine to slowly explore his lips and mouth for the millionth time since they got together, and it still left a trace of excitement and desire in both of them. Blaine shifted in Kurt's arms, adjusting his position so he could sit in Kurt's lap and kiss him more effectively.

"I have something for you," Kurt breathed when they came up for air. "A gift."

"Kurt," Blaine whined. "We said no presents until it's the annual anniversary."

"I know. I just couldn't resist. I didn't plan on it, I swear. I would give it to you either way so we can wait for tomorrow if you want to."

"You're breaking the rules you created in the first place," Blaine reminded him.

"I'm not! I saw it and I knew you had to have it. It's not my fault it happened to be yesterday." Kurt defended himself with a smile. "It's like when you buy me a scarf when you see one you like or when I buy you a bowtie."

"You bought me another bowtie?" Blaine face lightened up and Kurt laughed.

"No. It was just an example. Let me get up and I'll bring it to you so you can see for yourself." Blaine reluctantly got off of Kurt, watching him search for something in his bag. When he came back, he didn't return to their previous position. He simply sat with his legs crossed opposite Blaine and handed him a nice narrow black box. Blaine carefully lift the lid and with one glance into the box, he fell in love with the object it was hiding.

"Kurt! Oh my god! It's beautiful!" Blaine took the watch out of the box, looking at it properly. It was a simple round watch face with a brown leather strap. Inside of the dial, there were small chainrings. Blaine could literally see the watch's inner workings, and it was one of the coolest things he'd ever seen.

"I had to buy it for you, Blaine. It would be such a shame if you didn't have this one in your possession."

"Thank you. I love it!" Blaine quickly got rid of the watch he was currently wearing and put the new one on his right wrist. He outstretched his hand to show Kurt and Kurt observed it before taking Blaine's hand and kissing his knuckles.

"It looks great on you, baby." He said approvingly.

"Thank you." Blaine repeated, already climbing back into Kurt's lap.

"Wait, it's not everything."

"What?"

"I have one more."

"But Kurt we agre-" Kurt put his finger on his lips to silence him.

"This one is not a regular gift. It's something I've been thinking of lately and I finally gained the courage to give it to you. I don't want you to feel pressured. If you don't want it, just say so and we'll come back to it later, like in a few months or a year or something." Blaine stared wordlessly at him, wondering what Kurt was talking about and why he needed to use riddles. "I felt like giving it to you on our anniversary is more symbolic than giving it to you on a regular day so... " Kurt took out another box from his bag, this time it was a lot smaller. He put it into Blaine's hand, urging him to open it. Before finding out what was hiding in there, Blaine shook it a little bit, listening whether there would be any sound indicating what might be inside. It didn't help so he opened the box, almost dropping it down when he realized what it was.

"You don't have to accept it if you don't want to…" Kurt told him quietly, not sure what to read into lack of reaction from Blaine.

"A key? You are giving me your key?"

"Yeah...so you could come whenever you want. Whether I'm home or not. I know we're nowhere ready to move in together and it's not what I meant by it. This way you don't have to wait until I'm finished with school or band practice when we're hanging out at my place. And if Sam calls with an emergency and needs you to disappear for a few hours, you don't have to wander the city if I'm not home."

"I-I don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything. Just think about it." Blaine took the key out of the box and stood up, walking to the door. He pulled his keys out of the bowl on the small cabinet next to door and hitched Kurt's key on his key ring.

"I need to talk to Sam but I think he will be okay with it if I make a key of our apartment for you."

"Blaine, it's not why I gave you my key."

"I know. It's just...I think it's a good idea to have the access into each other's apartments in case of emergency." Blaine walked back to the living room area, sitting down on the sofa and patting the spot next to him. Kurt joined him and Blaine took his hands.

"I have something for you, too…" Blaine said as he ran his thumb across Kurt's knuckles. "It's not a regular gift but...I think it was appropriate to do tonight."

"Okay, I would so give you a speech about your double standard in giving gifts if I wasn't curious."

"What double standard?"

"That you CAN give me a gift while complaining about me doing the same."

"It's not…" Blaine started but then he changed his mind. "Just wait a second." He disappeared in his room. He came back for Kurt a couple minutes later. Entwining their fingers, he led him down the hall. As he opened the door to his room and stepped in, his boyfriend stopped at the threshold. Blaine turned around to see what was wrong but the stunned expression on Kurt's face erased his worries at once.

The room was softly lit by candle light and rose petals covered the blanket on Blaine's bed. Blinds were rolled down and there was soft piano music playing in the background. Kurt took in everything before he let his eyes set on Blaine.

"Are you for real?" He asked disbelievingly, finally entering the room. He wrapped his arms around Blaine's shoulder and pressed their foreheads together.

"It's been so long since we lit candles…" Blaine explained. "I know how you like the atmosphere we created for our second first time so I thought we could reenact it tonight."

Kurt stayed silent. Blaine could feel his fingers playing with the curls on the nape of his neck, but it was the only movement either of them did.

"I once told you you're everything I've ever dreamt of...It's not true. You are so much more than I ever dared to dream of, Blaine. I cherish every single little thing you do for me, and there have been tons of them so far, but believe me when I say I remember them all. From the four leaf clover, through random texts, songs in my voicemail, coffees on my desk at school, flowers to brighten my day when I have morning classes, all day long shopping trips without a single word of complaint even though I end up not buying anything, being patient with me when I'm grumpy and dealing with all my moods with a smile, kissing me when I need it but also knowing when I need my alone time and I could go on and on about what makes you a perfect boyfriend...You are my Prince Charming. Thank you. Thank you for making me the happiest guy in the whole world."

Blaine surged forward and crashed their lips together, overwhelmed with Kurt's words and struggling to find his own to respond. And then, he realized, he didn't need much to show Kurt how much he meant to him.

"I love you." He barely finished his sentence when Kurt replied with his own "I love you, too." After that, they left words forgotten and manifested their affection in a perfect rhythm of their body language.


	15. Best summer ever

_By the time Blaine got to the pictures from last summer, he was absolutely convinced about his craziness. How the hell could he talk to Kurt like that? How the hell could he think, even for a one second, that Kurt didn't love him? Why the hell did Kurt have to send him a message just now saying good night and making him feel worse? Blaine didn't reply. He knew Kurt would call him back if he did, and he wasn't ready to talk to his boyfriend yet. Instead he looked at their summer photos, remembering every single detail of it..._

Their first - and so far the only - summer was spent in a row of unforgettable events that Blaine would cherish for the rest of his life. Kurt practiced with his band a lot since they were playing gigs at least twice a week. Blaine often accompanied him, and when the band played out of the city, they stayed in the place they were playing for a day or two longer.

Blaine wasn't without a job either. He occasionally stepped in for a pianist in their favorite restaurant and Kurt was there every time, sitting close to the piano and smiling at Blaine throughout the whole playlist. They had a meal after, lunch or dinner, depending on what time Blaine was playing.

The most rebellious thing he'd ever done happened that summer as well - Kurt and Santana talked him into clubbing. Elliot made him and Sam fake IDs and they went dancing anytime it tickled their fancy. Blaine never had a drink though. He was breaking the rules as it was, he didn't want to push his luck. Kurt made fun of him for that but in the end, he just kissed Blaine deeply and told him how adorable he was. And then they had sex when they came home, and Blaine couldn't really complain about that.

Another thing Blaine was very excited about was the camping trip. They were going to Ohio for two weeks to be with their families and Burt, along with Phillip Anderson, decided on one of their business meetings that they could use a few days off with their sons and came up with the idea of camping. Kurt wasn't as excited as Blaine was. The mere thought of sleeping in a tent for five nights in a row wasn't appealing at all but he at least managed to convince his father about sharing his tent with Blaine.

Kurt liked the idea of Blaine, Cooper and Phillip being together for a few days, in the forest, away from civilization and work that seemed to always get in the way of them bonding. Kurt, on the other hand, bonded with his father and step-brother just fine so he didn't need to be surrounded by trees without a phone or a laptop to have some alone time with his own family. He thought the Andersons could use the time alone, without them being around but he was afraid they wouldn't go anywhere if the Hudmelson's decided not to join them.

A week before their flight home, Kurt was sitting on his couch, legs crossed and laptop on his lap. He didn't even bother to raise his head from the screen when he heard keys in the lock. It could only be Blaine and Kurt was too deep in his searching to go and greet him.

"Hi, baby." Kurt said, his eyes still glued on the laptop. "What are you doing here? I thought you were having the weird Star Wars thing with Sam tonight."

"Yeah. It's still on. I just needed to talk to you and I didn't want to do it on the phone." Blaine sat next to him and Kurt finally looked at him.

"What's wrong? Why are you so sad?" He put the laptop on the coffee table, shifting his body to fully face his boyfriend.

"My dad called today…"

"Oh, no…" Kurt whispered. "What case is it this time? Did he cancel the camping trip?"

"Actually, it's not any case this time...Coop got cast in some movie. It was a last minute decision because the guy who landed the part initially bailed on them. He learnt it this morning. He has to be available for the next couple of weeks. His schedule is only like a day or two of shooting per week, but you know, he can't fly to Ohio in case there would be schedule changes…It's not a big part but it is at least something."

"I'm so sorry, Blaine. I know how you were looking forward to spending time with him…"

"Well, my dad thinks that we should go to LA for those two weeks we were supposed to spend together in Ohio. So we wouldn't miss out on our family time with Cooper...My mom is all for it and I couldn't really tell them that I don't wanna go."

"You won't be coming home with me?" Blaine shook his head no. He looked defeated.

"I was just browsing some camping tips and tricks so I wouldn't embarrass you." Kurt admitted. "I guess I won't need them anymore…"

"But you can still go with Burt and Finn."

"No, the only reason I was going in the first place was that you were going to be there."

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay, baby." Kurt pecked his lips and wrapped his arm around Blaine's shoulder to tug him into his side. "We've been together the whole summer and there are still two weeks of summer break left after we come back to the city. We can survive family time, right?"

"Yeah...I just really wanted to spend some time with Finn as well. We've become pretty close over the internet since we met. I know I would enjoy a camping trip with you guys more than LA…"

"You'll get to spend some time with your parents and brother. I know how much that means to you even though it's not how we planned it. Maybe you can go camping in California, not too far from LA so Cooper could easily return to city if needed…"

"You're right. I'm just being stupid…"

"No, you're not stupid. You were just looking forward to something that won't happen now, it's okay to be disappointed. Look at it from a different angle. You and your parents are visiting your brother. Together. As a family. Isn't it something you missed so much? The four of you being together?" Blaine didn't respond. He stayed quiet for a long time, playing with a loose thread on Kurt's pillow.

"Baby," Kurt started carefully. "There is something you are not telling me."

"I'm afraid of going…"

"What? Why?"

"When things got too much in Ohio, I always had somewhere to go. Like when I needed to get out of the house because Cooper was being Cooper and I'd had enough...I don't know anyone in LA. I've never been there. With him landing the part in a movie, he'll be insufferable. I just know that. My best defense is escape but I don't think I can apply it in LA. And I feel like the worst brother ever because I should be happy for him...I mean, I am happy for him..."

"But?" Kurt prompted him.

"But I wanted a few days where the focus wouldn't be solely on him. I wanted to have fun on a camping trip...I wanted your brother to treat ME like his younger brother because he does that better than my own. I wanted to show you how to catch a fish. And then I wanted you to show me how to prepare it on an open fire. I wanted to play the guitar around a campfire and sing songs with you. I wanted to listen to you bitching about bugs and mosquitos. I wanted our fathers to talk about something else than work. I wanted my brother to come to me for advice on how to build a tent because he sure as hell doesn't know that...I feel like a spoiled brat because the way I see it now? It's like something has been taken from me again. Like I was put aside for something better...and yeah, Coop getting the part is much better and more important than a camping trip but I can't help it. Just once, I'd like to do something I want to do instead of doing what others want me to do…And I really like camping. We used to do it with Warblers every summer."

"Okay," Kurt nodded. "You seriously need to start working on your assertiveness, baby. We'll get to it as soon as you come back from LA."

"I don't wanna work on my assertiveness, Kurt."

"Great! You've just passed first lesson!" Kurt clapped his hands, giving Blaine a big smile.

"I did?" Blaine asked with a laugh. "What is my reward?"

Kurt leaned in to kiss his lips chastely but Blaine thought he did better on his assertiveness test than that. He cupped Kurt's cheeks with his hands and took control over the kiss, pushing Kurt to lay on the sofa.

"What about Sam and Star Wars?" Kurt mumbled after the button on his jeans was quickly opened by eager Blaine.

"They can wait." Blaine's answer was followed by Blaine's fingers on Kurt's zipper and seriously, who was Kurt to deny him something?

* * *

"Hi, baby! Is everything alright?" Sleepy Kurt picked up the phone, still laying in his bed.

"Hi. I'm sorry to call you so early but I wanted to let you know that I'm about to board."

"Oh, great! I should get up then."

"You have hours until I'll be back in New York, Kurt. Go back to sleep. Your flight back was pretty late yesterday. You must be tired."

"No! I'm fine. I swear. I wanna talk to you."

"I have to turn off my phone soon, Kurt."

"Okay...I missed you when I came back and you weren't here. The city is lonely without you."

"I'm almost there. A few more hours."

"I know. I'll be waiting at the airport."

"I have to go now, Kurt. Love you."

"I love you too." Blaine hang up and turned off his cell phone. He had a long flight ahead of him but, at the end of his journey, his boyfriend would be waiting for him with open arms. That's what got him through awful turbulence on the full flight.

He spotted Kurt immediately after he claimed his luggage. Kurt ran to him, throwing his arms around him and hugging him tightly.

"Thank god you're here! I missed you so much." He whispered in his ear. Blaine pulled away and connected their lips in a sweet kiss.

"Let's get out of here. I need to kiss you and hold you properly."

"Sure." Kurt nodded and took Blaine's suitcase in one hand, while the other hand found it's way easily into Blaine's.

Kurt led them outside and across the parking lot to the car parked at the far end. Blaine stared at the big black vehicle, not believing Kurt would do that.

"You rented a car? And if so, why a Toyota Rav4? Didn't they have something smaller?"

"This car is small considering what I need it to swallow." Kurt told him calmly and before he had a chance to say something more, two people jumped out of the car to greet Blaine. Without a word, he just put Blaine's suitcase into the trunk.

"Oh my god! Finn! What are you doing here?!" Blaine shouted as Finn embraced him.

"I see," Sam crossed his arms on his chest. "I'm good enough only when big brother isn't here."

"Shut up, Sam!" Blaine laughed and hugged his best friend as well.

"Oh, come on! I'm dying from boredom! Could you leave this little reunion with hobbit for later? We should hit the road!" Blaine turned around, staring at Santana standing by the car next to them with wide eyes.

"What?!"

"Okay. Let's go." Kurt ordered, tugging on Blaine's hand to get him into the car.

"I wanna say hello, too!" The door on Santana's car opened and an enthusiastic Dani quickly squeezed Blaine before returning to the car at her girlfriend's death glare.

"Welcome home!" A grinning Elliot waved him from the car through window. "I would get out but I'm afraid Santana might kill me."

"Hi!" Ted's head appeared in the window next to Elliot's and Blaine just stood there, dumbfounded.

"Well, everybody said their hello, LET'S GO!" Santana ushered them into their car and then sat behind the steering wheel of the other one.

"Kurt? What's going on?" Blaine dared to ask when they were comfortably sitting in the back of the Toyota.

"We are going on a camping trip." Kurt responded simply, making his boyfriend speechless. "I hated that Cooper didn't want to go while you were in LA. You deserve to have your annual camping trip. I know we're not Warblers but it's the best assembly I could get together on such a short notice."

"Camping trip?"

"Yeah. There's this nice place not too far from the city and we thought we should check it out. Everything is in the back. I packed your clothes so you wouldn't have to camp in your LA attire."

"Oh my god! I can't believe it! You organized a camping trip for me!"

"I did. I hope you like your surprise."

"I love it!" Blaine beamed at him. "I absolutely love it and I love you. I love you so much! Thank you." Blaine expressed more of his gratitude with a tender kiss, keeping in mind that they weren't alone.

"I love you, too." Kurt mutter against his lips, capturing them again softly.

 


	16. In health or sickness

It was after midnight and Blaine was still flipping through the pages of their scrapbook for what seemed like the thousandth time that evening. He should go to sleep. He should get some rest so he could face the day with the strength and energy he would need, but sleep wouldn't come. He was anxious and tired and, the more he thought about his conversation with Kurt, the more guilty and awful he felt. Kurt would never put him aside. Never. If Kurt knew Blaine was having a bad day, he wouldn't have cancelled on their date. He would have come right away. How could Blaine get so stuck in his head to take it out on the one person in his life who always was there for him? Kurt had willingly put the most important gig at risk for Blaine last year. Without even thinking about it. How could Blaine, for even one second, think that Kurt didn't love him?

It was a cold autumn morning and Blaine was tucked in his bed, under the covers but shivering. His head was pounding and the waves of cold and hot were sweeping through his body. He effectively managed to turned his ringing phone off several times until he realized it wasn't his alarm clock but Kurt calling.

"H'llo?" He said, his thick voice surprising him.

"Blaine? Where are you? Is everything alright?"

"Home. What's the time?"

"9.15. We were supposed to meet at NYADA cafe half an hour ago."

"'m sorry," Blaine murmured and it took a lot of his non existing energy. "I don't feel good. I think I'll stay home today."

"What's wrong, baby? Are you hurt?"

"Tired...my head hurt…"

"Do you have a temperature?"

"Don't know."

"Do you have something for cold or flu in your medicine cabinet?"

"Don't know."

"Okay, baby. Go and take your temperature and check the contents of your medicine cabinet. Call me if you need anything."

"I'll be fine," Blaine lied, because he didn't want his boyfriend to worry more than necessary.

"Call me and let me know, okay?"

"'kay. Gotta go. Talking is exhausting…"

"Okay. Don't call me then, baby. Just text me. But don't forget to let me know."

"I will. Love you."

"Love you, too." Blaine hang up and put his phone on his bedside table with much more effort than what was usually needed for such an action. Standing up and going to find a thermometer and some pills wasn't an option for him. He stayed in bed, falling asleep in a matter of seconds.

He woke up again two hours later, sweaty and burning. He didn't even need a thermometer to know he had a temperature, so he forced himself to get up and go to the bathroom to look into their medicine cabinet only to find out there was nothing he could use. Not even a cough syrup. He and Sam should probably keep it updated in the future. He was considering a visit to the pharmacy down the block but since he could barely stand on his feet, he quickly changed his mind. He slowly returned to his bed and the moment his head hit the pillow, he was fast asleep again.

The third time he was woken up by soft hand stroking his hair. At first, he thought he was dreaming but when he opened his eyes, he saw his boyfriend sitting on his bed.

"K-" He coughed a little. "Kurt? What are you doing here?"

"You didn't let me know. I sent you like twenty texts and you didn't reply. I was worried. Now, come on, we need to get you out of here. Your pajamas and sheets are all sweaty. You have to change and I'll take care of new sheets, okay?"

"You should go. I don't want you to get sick." Blaine said weekly and Kurt shook his head.

"No way I'm leaving now, Blaine. Sit up." He ordered and helped Blaine out of his wet clothes into the dry ones. He then put his arms around Blaine's waist and walked him into the living room, settling him down on the sofa.

"Here," he handed him a thermometer. "I'm gonna make you tea. I'll be right back."

Blaine obeyed. He didn't really have a chance not to. He snuggled under the blanket Kurt prepared for him, with the thermometer under his armpit, looking small and pitiful. Kurt came back with a cup of tea and thermos a few minutes later and put it down on the coffee table.

"Give me the thermometer, baby." Blaine did as he was told. Kurt took the item and observed it, frowning. "It's not good. Here, take these pills. It should bring the temperature down. If we don't get it under control by the evening, I'm taking you to the hospital."

"No." Blaine whined but Kurt only shoved pills into his hand.

"Take these. It should help. Here is also cough syrup and nasal spray. Now, lay down. Do you want me to turn the TV on?"

"I think I'm gonna sleep. You should go home, though. You have an important performance on Friday. You can't get sick."

"Leave it to me to worry about that, okay? Now, are you comfortable?" Blaine nodded.

"Great. I'm gonna open the window in your room to clear the air of germs. I'll change your sheets and wash the sweaty ones."

"Kurt, you don't have to do that."

"Gosh, you are really a difficult patient. Just shut up and let me do it. Sam is out of the city, who is going to take care of you? You can barely move!"

"But your gig on Fr-"

"It's two days from now. I'll be fine. Rest!" Kurt turned around and left, leaving Blaine alone. Blaine closed his eyes but stayed awake. He could hear Kurt moving quietly around the apartment. He had no idea how much time passed until Kurt came back to him but it felt like ages.

"Blaine, have you eaten anything today?"

"No...I'm not hungry." Kurt sat down next to him and put his hand on his forehead.

"You're still too warm...I hope pills will kick in soon. You need to eat something, though."

"No. I'll be fine, really. Just go already, Kurt. You can't get sick."

"You're like a broken record, Blaine. I'll stay for however long I think it's necessary. I have to go to band practice but I'll be back in the evening. I'll make you chicken soup. I'm not gonna force you to eat anything now but you have to eat at least one big bowl of soup for dinner, okay?"

Blaine didn't protest. He knew it was pointless.

"Can I go back to my bed?"

"Sure. Do you want me to help you?"

"No. I think I can manage. I already feel a bit better."

"If you are lying to me just to make me leave, it won't work, Anderson."

"I'm not. I promise. I can walk back to my room. I'll see you in a few hours, right?"

"Right." Kurt smiled at him brightly and kissed his cheek which made Blaine object but Kurt just laughed and kissed his other cheek before he grabbed his things and left.

By the time Kurt opened the door to his apartment again, Blaine was feeling a lot better in comparison to that morning. He was even looking forward to Kurt's chicken soup. Kurt took excellent care of him and it was kind of nice to have someone who put everything aside for him.

Kurt stayed the night on the sofa, just in case Blaine's condition got worse. It didn't. Blaine woke on Thursday morning with a scratchy voice and runny nose, but no temperature. Kurt went to his classes and returned back with a jar of honey. He fed Blaine tablespoons of it, alongside some lemon tea and Blaine obeyed even though he didn't like it at all.

In the evening, Blaine ate chicken soup and also a tuna sandwich just to make Kurt happy and then they occupied Blaine's bed to watch a movie together. However, Kurt fell asleep within the first five minutes. Blaine's worst concerns became a reality, when Kurt woke up with a fever on Friday morning. His band missed the performance where a talent seeker was going to be but Kurt just shrugged his shoulders at it.

"It's just a performance. There'll be other opportunities. You needed me and it was more important. I would risk performing for the president if necessary. You come first. Always." He said to Blaine in a hoarse voice and Blaine brought him in for a kiss, forgetting all about germs and viruses.


	17. Prep boys

_Blaine fell into an uneasy sleep after all, only to be woken up from a nightmare...or something he considered to be a nightmare. In his dream, Kurt was all over his ex-boyfriend, intentionally making Blaine jealous and they were laughing right in his face. What was the worse moment that made Blaine toss awake was Kurt saying I love you to Ben. First. He said it first._

_Blaine had to gain a conscious level before he reminded himself, that Kurt had never loved Ben. He even said so. There was no way Kurt would leave Blaine for Ben. But the words Ben told him in the coffee shop were still fresh in his head: How long do you think will he stick around? He is probably already one foot out the door. Even though Blaine refused to believe Ben was right, he couldn't get their brief encounter from the morning out of his mind. It was the first time he had talked to the guy. In almost two years he was part of Kurt's life it was the first time that Ben had a courage to approach him. He just wished Kurt's ex-boyfriend was as classy as his own had been when he'd met Kurt…_

It was just a few months ago, when they were visiting their families during their Spring break. Kurt's dad had an appointment with his doctor and Kurt wanted to be there even though it was just a regular check-up. Blaine had the Warblers reunion that week. They spent a few days in Westerville before Kurt went to Lima.

Blaine was pretty excited about the reunion. It was held every five years, generations of former Warblers coming with their partners and other halves, remembering their time at Dalton. Blaine was curious whether he would get to talk only to guys he knew or if he maybe exchange a few words with older Warblers as well. He didn't ask Kurt to go with him. It was tradition for Warblers to come with their significant others but Blaine couldn't really imagine Kurt in the midst of all that preppiness. He would do it, without a doubt, but Blaine didn't want him to be uncomfortable so he didn't even mention the possibility of Kurt coming with him.

He came right on time. His dad dropped him off at the big Dalton parking lot that was almost completely full. Blaine looked around but he couldn't find any familiar faces amongst the crowd. He went inside and as soon as he stepped into the first room, he was attacked from behind and engulfed in a bear hug.

"I missed you so much, cutie." A soft voice whispered into his ear and Blaine couldn't help himself not to shiver.

"I missed you too, Wyatt." Blaine said truthfully as he returned the hug.

"I want you just for myself at least for a while tonight, okay? We have a lot to catch up on...Gosh, look at you. As handsome as ever. I can't believe it's been almost three years since I last saw you."

"We agreed it was for the best."

"We agreed to stay in touch too but apparently we can't keep our promises."

"Oh come on, we stayed in touch."

"Email, once a month, barely more than ten sentences isn't staying in touch, babe."

"I've never heard you complaining."

"I'm complaining now." Wyatt smiled at him and grabbed his hand to lead him to the table.

"That's Wyatt and Blaine!" Someone screamed and soon Blaine was surrounded with his friends, more and more coming as the time passed. It was good to be in their presence. It brought back old memories and they talked and laughed, doing stupid - and for such preppy boys - inappropriate things during a dean's speech in the big Dalton hall.

They had dinner, staying together and messing up the seating but with Blaine's politeness and other guys' craziness, they couldn't be denied anything. Everything went smoothly and since Blaine wasn't the only one there without a partner, he didn't mind Kurt's absence that much. He missed him, especially when he saw couples dancing after dinner, however he still had his friends around and they kept him busy.

"Do you wanna dance?" Wyatt asked him as he once again glanced at the dancefloor.

"No," Blaine shook his head. "I'm fine."

"Do you remember our last dance?"

"Wyatt, don't. Okay?"

"Why not? We've been talking about everything but us, Blaine. That's ridiculous! It's part of our past, why are you so uptight about it?"

"Because it is our past. I don't see how talking about us and what we were is going to help either of us tonight." Blaine crossed his arms at his chest, his eyes fixed anywhere but his ex-boyfriend. He didn't want to hurt him but, with the way Wyatt was looking at him, the same way he'd looked at him when they were an item, causing pain seemed to be inevitable.

"I was looking into school in New York." Wyatt blurted out, making Blaine turn his head and gape at him.

"What?!"

"Do you ever regret it?"

"Regret what?"

"Us breaking up...I tried to move on but it's impossible, Blaine. There is no one like you out there. I love California but I feel like we didn't give us a chance. I want to have that chance, Blaine."

"I have a boyfriend. I-I'm sorry but I don't regret a thing. You can't keep looking for me in others. You need to be with them for who they are. My boyfriend is nothing like you and I love him more than anything. You will find someone, Wyatt. Just give it time. We wouldn't work out. You know we wouldn't."

"How do you know that?"

"I don't want to be mean. I still care about you so don't take this wrong, please. It's just me being honest. I love Kurt. It's a different kind of love than what we had but I feel like that's it for me. He is it for me…"

"Is he?" Wyatt asked bitterly. "Then why isn't he here? One would think this was a great opportunity to show him off…"

"He would have come if he knew he was supposed to...I didn't tell him. This isn't his world. He is a free spirit and Dalton is too uptight for him. I didn't want to make him uncomfortable."

"There's something fishy about it, Blaine."

"There is not." Blaine objected, getting frustrated. A low whistle startled him and he glared at Sebastian sitting next to him.

"What the hell, man?"

"Look," Seb motioned his head to the guy standing at the entrance. "I don't know who he's here with but apparently they don't give him the attention he deserves. I'm gonna tap that tonight."

"No, you're not." Blaine stated.

"He is looking in our direction. Go on being all I don't love you anymore and let me be. I have a guy to seduce."

"It's not gonna work, Seb." But Sebastian didn't listen. The guy came toward them and Seb immediately outstretched his hand to him.

"Hey, hot stuff. I'm Sebastian."

"Hi, handsome." The blue eye beauty said to Blaine, ignoring Sebastian.

"Hi." Blaine breathed with a smile that could definitely cure cancer.

"So," Sebastian interrupted. "I'm gonna tell you right away, that this guy is taken," he motioned toward Blaine, "and he also has to deal with his ex-boyfriend who wants to get back together with him. I suggest we get lost and leave them to work on their issues. What do you say?"

"Ex-boyfriend?" The guy seized Wyatt up. "Interesting."

"I saw an open bar in the next room. Mind having a drink with me?" He turned back to Blaine.

"Are you deaf? He has a boyfriend!" Wyatt stood in front of Blaine, making the new guy snicker.

"Didn't stop YOU in pursuing him a while ago."

"Kurt," Blaine took guy's hand. "It's okay."

"Kurt? The boyfriend Kurt?"

"Do you have any problem with it?" Kurt asked, narrowing his eyes at Wyatt dangerously.

"No." Wyatt raised his hands. "Not at all. I'm sorry. I should have backed off when Blaine told me he was in a relationship. Please, accept my apology. It won't happen again."

"I hope not." Was the only thing Kurt said, multiplying the thick air between them.

"This is your boyfriend?" Seb asked, stunned. "You surely knows how to pick 'em. Jesus, I would have never thought you have it in you. Getting a guy like this...I have to bow before you, Anderson. I also want to remind you that I am the one who taught you all the tricks about hitting on guys so maybe you could consider a little fun in three? You know, as a way to thank me."

"The only fun we are ever going to consider is the fun between the two of us," Kurt responded coldly and Sebastian smirked at him.

"Not to brag, Kurt, but I was told I'm an animal in bed. You shouldn't be so quick in your judgment." Kurt took a step closer, getting right into Sebastian's personal space.

"Back off or your stupid face will have fun with my fist."

"Okay, I guess we're going to get some drinks. See you guys around." Blaine dragged Kurt out of there, afraid of bringing too much attention to them.

"What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to be your plus one tonight." Kurt mumbled, embarrassed. "I didn't mean to make a scene…" Blaine took two glasses of white wine and led Kurt deeper into Dalton halls. They ended up sitting on the windowsill in the quiet area.

"Sebastian had it coming. Don't worry about it...I-I'm sorry, Kurt, I just can't believe you are here. I really could use a plus one tonight. Especially a hot plus one as yourself."

"Why didn't you ask me to come with you then? Are you ashamed of me?"

"What? No! Of course not!"

"Your mom thought we were going together. She was thrilled and tried to give me some advice on how to survive in this environment. I didn't know what she was talking about at first. Then she explained to me how it is a tradition to come with your significant other to any Dalton event. I was waiting for you to say something but you never did. I was wondering what was wrong with me and why you didn't want me here. I was on the phone with Rachel, sulking and she ordered me to dress up and go...to surprise you. It seemed like a good idea at the time...I'm sorry that I came unannounced and I'm sorry if I embarrassed you in front of your friends. I just don't like when someone is claiming what is not theirs. I can go home...My dad won't be that far away from here. He can come back for me…"

"No! I'm glad you're here!" Blaine squeezed his hand.

"Really?" Kurt asked hopefully, his lips finally letting go of a frown and forming a half smile.

"Really. I didn't tell you anything because this isn't your thing at all. I wanted you to enjoy your time with your family instead of being on a formal private school event."

"I enjoy my time whenever and wherever I am as long as I'm with you…"

"Come here," Blaine whispered and cupped Kurt's face in his hand, bringing him in for a tender kiss.

"So…" Kurt trailed off, biting his lower lip. "It's not because you wanted to spend some alone time with your ex? To find out if there is still something?"

"Is that what you were thinking?"

"I was trying to come up with some reason why you would keep me away from here…" Kurt kept his eyes on the floor, insecurities basically seeping through him. Blaine put his fingers under his chin to lift his head up.

"I love you, Kurt. You and nobody else. There is nothing between me and Wyatt. It ended with high school and it'll stay that way. He was a bit melancholic tonight but I told him I have a boyfriend who I love very much. Nothing would happen."

"I know. I know you wouldn't cheat on me. I trust you but…"

"But?"

"I was afraid you would find out there were still some feelings and you would break up with me…"

"That's not gonna happen."

"Good." Kurt nodded and leaned forward to kiss Blaine's cheek. "I'm sorry I was acting like a jerk back in there."

"You weren't. It was fun seeing Sebastian lose for once. He broke too many hearts for one person."

"What now?"

"Now we are going to drink this wine and I'm going to introduce you to my old friends."

"Sounds great," Kurt sent him a wide smile. "Do you think you're up for some shenanigans tonight?"

"What do you have in mind?"

"Since you got much better about breaking rules, I was wondering if we could find a janitor's closet..."

"What for?"

"A make out session?" Blaine laughed, long and loud, shaking his head in disbelief. "Are you serious right now?"

"Well, it's not like I could do it at McKinley. I feel like I didn't have a proper high school experience when it comes to dating. We are in a high school now so I thought…" Kurt shrugged his shoulders, sipping from his wine.

"Okay. We're not going into the janitor's closet but Dalton has impressive bleachers. Mind kissing me there?"

"I don't mind kissing you anywhere, baby."

"Very well then. Let's go back. We can find my friends and dance a bit. I promise to sneak out for that make out before we go home." Blaine stood up and offered his hand to Kurt. "Ready?"

"As I'll ever be. I'm sorry in advance if I do something inappropriate. I'm not built for this."

"You're built for me. That's all that matters."

"Sap." Kurt teased him.

"Love you."

"I love you too, Blaine."


	18. Take my spot

_Blaine sat at the kitchen table early in the morning. He was tired and mad at himself for his behavior the previous evening. He couldn't even bring himself to make a cup of coffee because coffee reminded him of Kurt and he wouldn't be able to enjoy it knowing his boyfriend was home, probably wondering what he had done to set Blaine on fire like that._

_Truth be told, he hadn't done anything wrong. He always supported Blaine and stood by his side no matter what. He'd even given up on a great opportunity just so Blaine could have his chance to shine._ Shit, Anderson, what was wrong with you yesterday?! _Blaine groaned and buried his head into his hands, remembering very clearly the day when Kurt handed him what was supposed to be his._

* * *

Everybody was talking about it. The news spread all over the NYADA student body in matter of minutes. There was a buzz going on, bets taken on who would be amongst the chosen and Blaine didn't really care about any of it. He knew Kurt was in. If June Dolloway was coming to see the best seniors perform, then Kurt was at the top of the list.

There was a big mystery clouding the persona of June Dolloway. People either loved her or hated her. She was very outspoken and it was easy to get into a conflict with her. Either way, she was the best when it came to giving a chance to young artists.

Blaine was very excited that day. The official list of performers wasn't going up until the next morning but from the happy faces on a few seniors he passed by during the day, he could tell they already knew. He texted Kurt to find out if his boyfriend was on the list but Kurt was very busy and his response was short -  _We'll talk about it when we meet for coffee. xo_

Blaine got to the NYADA coffee shop with thirty minutes to spare. He took out his notebook and started writing down ideas of what Kurt could show to June to impress her. He wanted to be ready if his boyfriend asked for his opinion. He was at the end of the third page of songs Kurt had mastered when his phone rang.

"Hi!" He picked the call up with his trademark enthusiasm. "I'm waiting for you at NYADA coffee. Where are you?"

"On my way. Can we meet somewhere else, though? You know, less NYADA?"

"Oh...Sure? What do you have in mind?"

"I'm hungry. Maybe the snack bar two blocks from campus?"

"Okay. I'll be there. Kurt, is everything alright?"

"Yeah. Why wouldn't be? See you soon, baby. Bye."

"Bye." Blaine ended the call, confused.

He rushed out of the coffee shop, down the street and around the corner. It didn't take long to get into the snack bar Kurt was referring to. Blaine stepped inside, looking around. It was late afternoon but it was almost empty in there. His boyfriend was sitting at a table at the far end of the room, a burger and fries in front of him. He wasn't eating though. He just sat there, staring out the window, clearly deep in his thoughts. Blaine approached him carefully, making sure he was in Kurt's view when he greeted him.

"Hi," Blaine said softly, smiling at Kurt who immediately stood up and leaned across the table to give Blaine a kiss.

"Hi," Kurt greeted back, sitting down. Blaine took a seat opposite him and watched Kurt as he pushed his plate forward.

"Do you want some?" He asked.

"No. Thanks. I'm not hungry. Why aren't you eating?"

"I've done something, and I should have probably consulted with you first," Kurt told him instead of answering his question. "I hope you won't get mad at me."

"What have you done?" Blaine asked curiously.

"Carmen called me into her office first thing this morning. She told me about June coming and how I was the first on her mind when it came to performers."

"I knew it!" Blaine smiled broadly, proud of him. "Of course, you were the first one on Carmen's mind. You are the best, Kurt! I'm so happy for you. What are you gonna perform?"

"Nothing," Kurt stated calmly.

"W-what?"

"I'm not performing anything. You are."

"WHAT?!" Blaine exclaimed and Kurt looked around, sending an apologetic look to the older man two tables away who got startled by Blaine's loud question.

"Calm down, baby. No need to disturb others. They are just trying to have a nice meal."

"Don't change the subject, Kurt! What the hell is that supposed to mean? How come you aren't gonna perform for June when you were chosen? And how did I even get into this? I'm only a junior!"

"I don't want to be a part of it...The performance for June."

"Are you crazy? That's the best opportunity a NYADA student can have!"

"I know. That's why I want YOU to have it ."

"What have you done, Kurt?" Blaine hissed and Kurt flinched, casting his eyes down on the burger.

"I don't get along with June. I've met the woman twice but we just didn't click. She is not going to choose me as her new project, I know it. But she could choose you. No. Let me rephrase that. She WILL choose you if you perform."

"How do you know that? How can you be so sure about it? You should at least try it! You're graduating in less than two months, Kurt! This is an opportunity that could help you a lot in your career!"

"I know. But it won't help me because I'm not gonna get it. Don't you understand?"

"No, I really don't!" Blaine huffed and crossed his arms on his chest. "Enlighten me more, because I'm lost in whatever nonsense it is you are talking about."

"June is mostly Broadway. She loves attention and she loves people who are ready to please her. She is also old school. That's why you are the best for her. You won't go against her, you are charming and you can pass for someone from the fifties if you want to. She's gonna love you. You're talented. You were born to be on the stage. One look at you and she'll be in love. I know you didn't want to go for anything that might start your career until you are out of school with a proper education but she won't be coming back next year. If she chooses someone this year, she'll put everything she has into her new 'project' and won't be back at least for two or three years. That's why you need to perform."

"She asked for seniors!"

"I know. But we talked about it with Carmen and she is willing to make an exception. People are probably gonna hate you for this but you can't take others into consideration now. It's your time. Your chance. You have to take it."

"It's a chance  _you_  have to take, Kurt!"

"No," Kurt shook his head. "I don't wanna go for Broadway. Not as a performer anyway. Maybe as a playwright, but we'll see about that in the future. Right now I want to focus on my band. She is not going to choose someone with a band. You know that. She's looking for the next big star… a Broadway star. That's you."

"This is ridiculous."

"No, it's not. I don't want that spot. I want you to take it. I want you to go and sweep her off of her feet, Blaine."

"I don't like this, Kurt. How could you not tell me about it first? Do I have a chance to say something about it?" Kurt bit his lower lip, looking guilty.

"I told Carmen you're in. She already put you on the list..."

"Shit, Kurt!"

"Look, I'm sorry, okay? I should have talked to you, I know. But Carmen just layed it on me this morning and all I could think about was how it was a great opportunity for you. I told her I don't want to be a part of it. I also suggested that you should get a chance because you are extremely talented. She agreed and I told her I'm giving you my spot. She wanted to run it by you first but I said it wasn't necessary, that I'll take care of it. I didn't think it would be a problem. Until I realized that I should have talked to you...or let her to talk to you about it... before putting you on the list. I just...I want you to try it. I have no doubts you would make it big without her but this way you wouldn't even have to go for an audition. She can introduce you to people who will hand you roles on the spot. You've worked hard for years, Blaine. This is what you want. This is your dream."

"It used to be your dream, too," Blaine reminded him and Kurt sighed heavily.

"It's not anymore. My band is first now. That's what I wanna do - make a living by playing. We're on the right path. We can make it. We're good. People love our songs. I put years into my band and I'm not leaving now."

"I'm not saying you have to leave. Just take the opportunity you have at hand. People would kill to be on the list. You can't just throw it away."

"Yes, I can. And just for the record, I'm not throwing it away. I'm giving it to you, baby."

"I don't want it! I didn't ask for it! You can't just make decisions for me, Kurt! You put me in a position I don't want to be in. The whole school is going to turn their backs on me. I still have a year to go. Did you think for a minute how this going to play for me? Most of my friends are your friends who are leaving with you. I'm going to be here next year, alone, with people who are going to hate me because I was handed something that wasn't meant for me!"

"Blaine," Kurt started soothingly. "Stop worrying about others. We are in a competitive environment. You know that. Kill or be killed. That's the law. They might hate you but every single one of them wouldn't even bat an eye if they were in your shoes right now. I admit I didn't handle this right. Going behind your back and putting you on the spot wasn't the brightest idea, but if you forget about the circumstances and just look at it as an opportunity, you know it's perfect for you."

"You can't keep going behind my back and deciding things for me, Kurt..." Blaine was upset. He still had his arms crossed on his chest, not even looking at Kurt. He didn't like when people made him their peasant and getting that kind of treatment from Kurt hurt.

"I'm sorry. I did it with your best interest in mind. It's not because I want to be controlling or something. I just want you to shine, you know..."

"I think you should try it."

"No," Kurt responded resolutely.

"You dismissed it too quickly, Kurt. At least sleep on it. If you feel like this in the morning, then I'll take the spot."

"There is no need to wait until morning. I will feel the same about it."

"Kurt!" Blaine warned him, his voice firm. "You basically ordered me what to do today. Don't you think I deserve to have a say in this as well? All I am asking for is to think about it."

"Okay. I will think about it," Kurt resigned with slumped shoulders.

"You're not just saying that, right? To make me shut up?"

"No. I mean it. I will think about it but I need you to promise me not to get upset if I don't change my mind."

"As long as you think it through properly, I'm not going to be upset no matter what your decision is."

"Thank you. I'm really sorry."

"I don't want to be ungrateful. It means a lot that you are willing to give this up for me. I just don't want you to regret it later."

"I could never regret anything that makes you happy. Being her new project is going to make you happy."

"Eat something," Blaine pushed the plate back to him. "You can't make a big decision on an empty stomach."

Blaine met Kurt for breakfast the following morning and the moment he spotted him, he could read on his face what his decision was. It didn't change overnight but Kurt brought the list of pros and cons to show Blaine that he really did think about it. That's how Blaine earned enemies at school but also won June over.


	19. Showcase

Blaine decided that sitting in the kitchen wasn't going to help him. He couldn't eat or drink anything either way, so he stood up and merged straight to the bathroom. He took a long warm shower but the tension in his muscles remained the same. When he came back to the kitchen, Sam was drowning cereal in a bowl full of milk.

"Good morning," he said with too much enthusiasm for Blaine, who currently felt like crying. "Why the long face?"

"I haven't slept much..."

"You had a lot to think about, right? What's the conclusion?"

"I think Kurt is going to break up with me."

"What?! You were supposed to realize how much he loves you overnight! What's wrong with you, man?"

"Oh, I did realize that he loves me. I just don't know if it's enough for him to want to stay with me..."

"Did you hurt your head yesterday? What the hell are you talking about?" Sam dropped his spoon into the bowl, spitting the milk on the table.

"I am officially a whiny boyfriend, Sam. And the whining...that's why he broke up with Ben."

"You're not a whiny boyfriend. You just had shit for brains yesterday."

"I met Santana last week."

"How does she come into the picture? She ships you two more than teenage girls ship those guys from One Direction. I think she would personally strangle Kurt if he was about to end your relationship."

"Kurt is leaving New York," Blaine said tiredly and sat down opposite his best friend, his posture the definition of defeat. "He's leaving and he hasn't said a word to me about it. I was waiting and...nothing."

"Why would he leave New York? That just doesn't make sense, Blaine."

"Santana told me about the concert they're having next week. You know, the most important one. Kurt never gave me any details. Just that it's important because some guy who could help them in their career should be there. The guy apparently owns clubs all across U.S.. He likes to choose three or four bands to perform in his establishments during week days for a whole year. He is basically going to send them on a tour around the US. I don't know what to think of it, Sam. Why didn't he tell me? I had to find out from Santana!"

"Why didn't you ask him about it? This is insane, man. I'm sure Kurt has his reasons why he hasn't told you yet. Maybe Sanatana has it wrong, you know. Maybe she ..."

"Maybe she what?"

"I don't know. You should talk to Kurt. Call him and demand answers."

Blaine shook his head no. "I can't. I have to go to meet June in an hour and I don't have time for this. I can't deal with it now. It'll have to wait until after the showcase. I can't screw that up, too, because it's probably the only thing that can keep me grounded right now."

"Kurt loves you, Blaine. Everything will work out. And you're a moron if you want to wait until tomorrow evening to talk to him."

"I know he does. But it would be stupid of him to focus on our relationship when his career is at stake. "

"He can still focus on both. Maybe that's why he hasn't told you anything. Because, for him, nothing changes with the offer."

"But everything will change. He won't be here while I still have a year of college to attend."

"Stop over thinking. It's doing no good," Sam ordered firmly. " Until you talk to him you can't know for sure what his intentions are."

"You're right."

"Of course I am. I'm a wise man." Sam grinned at him and shoved a spoonful of cereal into his mouth.

* * *

Kurt carefully observed three monitors in front of him. Each of them showed the big NYADA dance room where Blaine's showcase would take place in a few hours. The cameras had the room covered from all angles but he still had to make sure. He took it all in one more time.

"You'll be able to see everything, right? There is no chance that he will slip out of view."

"Kurt, why did you call me to set this up?" Kurt turned his head and glanced briefly at his classmate.

"Because you're the best NYADA has to offer, Mark."

"Damn right. I came here, put cameras everywhere without anyone noticing and when your sweetheart appears on that stage, I'm gonna stream the performace live for everyone to see. Well, everyone with the link to it but you know what I mean. "

"I'm just nervous, you know. I need this to work. It's very important."

"There is no one better for this job, Kurt. I put this together in two hours. No one would be able to do this on such short notice. You can see that the cameras are placed perfectly. Everything will be recorded."

"I know, I know. "

"Go home. Relax and come back this evening. Everything is set."

Kurt wasn't convinced, that much was obvious as he stared at the monitors again.

"I gave Rachel your number," Kurt said after a while. "She'll talk to some people and find an internship for you. She couldn't guarantee the position or length but she'll get you into the studios. She'll call you."

"Thanks. I knew it would be a pleasure to do business with you."

"Blaine tends to move really fast across the whole stage when he gets too deep into the performance. And he may jump on something...like the piano or any kind of furniture that tickles his fancy. You need to be very watchful so you won't miss a thing."

"Go home and let me do my job,"

"I'm counting on you, Mark."

"I know. And I promise not to let you down. Now go because you make me nervous."

"If something goes wrong, call me."

"Go home, Kurt."

"Okay," Kurt sighed and with one last look at the monitors, he left.

* * *

Pacing the floor in his dressing room ten minutes before the showcase had only one reason - Blaine hadn't heard from Kurt since he'd received the morning text from him. Up until now he didn't realize the consequences his behavior might have. What if Kurt wasn't showing up for his performance? Why would he? Blaine did nothing but ignore him for days.

The buzzing sound of the phone on the table startled him. He grabbed it quickly and couldn't help the disappointment after he saw it was just a text from his mom - just a text from his mom wishing him good luck. Since when was any acknowledgment from his parents a  _just_  thing?

Blaine neared the stage where he was going to bang his head against the wall. He sent a quick reply to his mom and speed dialed the person he should have talked to three days ago.

"Blaine?" Kurt's voice in receiver was unsure, like he couldn't believe Blaine was actually calling.

"Yeah, it's me. I wanted to ask...Kurt, are you coming to my showcase?"

"Well...Th-there was a nametag, right next to Santana's, with my name on it... and I'm already here sitting by the table with our friends but I can leave if you want me to."

"No! Stay! Please, don't go anywhere. I reserved you the best seats. I fought for that table with June!"

"Okay. I mean...I wouldn't really leave. I would hide somewhere in the corner. I wouldn't miss this for the world. But I'm glad I don't have to go behind your back. I know you hate it."

"Thank you for coming, Kurt. I was acting like a fool these past couple days and I…"

"Blaine, stop it. We'll talk about it later, okay? You have to focus on the performance now. I'll come to see you after."

"Can't wait."

"Me neither. Break a leg, baby."

* * *

Kurt disappeared with the first congratulations aimed at Blaine from the guests in attendance. He caught eyes with him and motioned his head to let him know he would be waiting outside. Blaine shot him a big smile, the one Kurt believed was reserved just for him, and it gave him necessary hope that everything would be alright between them eventually.

He watched people leaving the room and entering the one next to it where the 'after banquet' was held. Kurt laughed hard every time Blaine mentioned it. The after banquet was probably going to be as ridiculous as its name suggested and Kurt was happy his obligation to attend was taken away from him by June Almighty herself.

"It's very nice of you to come and support him," June said from behind him and he turned around, not liking her too sweet voice at all. "But you should go now."

"Excuse me?"

"Blaine was very upset the last few days. And from what I gathered you're the reason why. This is a very important night for Blaine. He doesn't need to deal with relationship problems at the moment."

"We don't have any relationship problems," Kurt cut in, glaring at the woman.

"You both are too young to even be in a serious relationship. You should focus on your careers. I don't think Blaine needs to be with a boy whose love he is questioning."

"I have no idea what you are talking about but with all due respect, our relationship is none of your business. Blaine has my full support in every aspect of his life - whether professional or personal - and he is the only one I have to prove my love to. I'm very grateful for what you've done for him. You gave him a great opportunity to get noticed and start his career but that's all. You have no say in his personal life. So no matter how much you dislike me, be prepared to see me often. I'm going to be right by his side until he gets tired of me."

"That's sweet," June smiled and her superior demeanor irritated Kurt so much that he almost formed a few harsh words about her persona, but before he had a chance to tell June how horrible she was, Blaine walked up to them.

"I'll leave you two alone. Blaine, I want you back in five minutes," she said and patted Blaine's cheek. Kurt held his eye roll which took a lot of strength. Had his relationship with Blaine not been in a fragile place, he wouldn't even care at this point.

"You were amazing," Kurt started quietly after June was out of sight.

"Thank you."

"I don't want to keep you from your admirers and potential employers and June is acting like a bad chaperone so can we meet after you finish here?"

"It might be late…"

"I don't care."

"I can stop by on my way home, then."

"Great. I'll be waiting." Kurt leaned forward and kissed Blaine's cheek, the one that didn't come into contact with June's hand a while ago. He didn't dare to do more. Not when he didn't know where they stood. A few more hours. It would be nothing in comparison to the sleepless nights he had this week. He at least knew, now, that Blaine was finally coming to him to talk.

 


	20. The talk

Blaine buzzed with excitement on his way to Kurt's apartment. The weariness from the past few days was gone. Who would've ever thought, that morning, that Blaine would be so wide-awake close to midnight after a few sleepless nights.

Laying his eyes on Kurt in the big NYADA dance room was everything he needed to forget all about the troubles he witnessed during the week. Kurt was there, smiling and cheering him on as if Blaine didn't act like a complete fool in days prior. Maybe Sam was right. Maybe Kurt had his reasons why he kept things from Blaine and those reasons had nothing to do with a potential break up.

His steps were light and he was so excited to finally get to Kurt that he didn't wait for the elevator in the lobby of Kurt's building but took a run up the stairs, the key to Kurt's apartment already in his hand. He let himself in and the first thing that came into his vision was Kurt peacefully sleeping on the couch, clutching a teddy bear Blaine had won for him at the carnival last summer to his chest.

Blaine sat down on the floor next to the couch, watching his boyfriend and debating whether to wake him or not. Kurt stirred in his sleep as Blaine carded his fingers through Kurt's hair.

"You're here."

"I can let you sleep and come back in the morning."

"No!" Kurt protested and rubbed his eyes. He slowly stood up from the couch and turned the lights on because the dimly lit room was what made him fall asleep in the first place.

"My parents called me," Blaine said when Kurt returned and sat down on the floor next to him. "My mom couldn't shut up about how she loved my performance and I was wondering how she could see it if they weren't there. How did you do that? How did you even know they weren't coming?"

"It was my dad's fault...that they couldn't come. He changed the date of the important meeting without consulting your dad and it was too late to do something about it. I was so pissed. I'm so sorry, Blaine. My dad takes full responsibility for this one."

"It's okay, Kurt."

"No, it's not! They were finally supposed to come and see you and then my dad got in the way and ruined it."

"They still saw me."

"It's not the same. Cameras can't replace a live performance…"

"How did you do that though?"

"Do you know Mark? The one from my combat class?"

"Yeah."

"He installed the cameras in the room and then livestreamed the performance…I just sent your parents and Cooper the link by email."

"Thank you…"

"It was the least I could do."

"I'm so sorry, Kurt. I have no excuse, just that I was being an irrational idiot these past few days…" Kurt tentatively outstretched his arm and took Blaine's hand, squeezing it softly before lacing their fingers together.

"What happened? I've never seen you like that before. We're always able to solve our disagreements on the spot. I still don't understand what set you off like that. You never shut me out..."

"I had a bad day and I let things get to me and...I just screwed up and I'm really sorry."

"I'm gonna need more than that, baby. I want an explanation."

"Okay," Blaine nodded and cast his eyes down. "I met Ben in the coffee shop that morning. And he actually approached me and said some stupid things…"

"What things?"

"Well...that you were probably one foot out the door and…"

"And?"

"He asked if you still had difficulties with saying  _I love you_. And that you two had coffee together the day before…"

"What?! That's ridiculous! Firstly, I did NOT have a coffee with him. I ran into him in the coffee shop and I politely asked how he was doing. That's all. He said fine, then he asked me the same question, I said great and we parted. The whole conversation didn't last more than a minute! And secondly, I do NOT have problems with saying I love you! What the hell? How dare he? I don't have problems with expressing my love, do I?" Blaine bit his upper lip, looking everywhere but at his boyfriend.

"Blaine? D-Do I? Oh my god!" Kurt jumped to his feet, all color from his face gone. "Oh my god! When you asked me if I loved you, you actually meant that! I thought you were just rambling some nonsense but...It was a deliberate question, wasn't it? You meant it! You asked that on purpose! Oh my god!"

"Kurt," Blaine started soothingly, afraid to get in the way of Kurt pacing. Kurt's hands were shaking as he strode around the room repeatedly.

"Have I ever behaved like I don't love you?" Kurt asked in a weak and trembling voice. "What have I done wrong? Jesus, Blaine. Have I ever not said it back when you told me you loved me? Or...Oh my god! I think I'm gonna be sick."

"You always say it back," Blaine whispered and then said it once again, more loudly. "You ALWAYS say it back."

"Then what's...I don't...Where did it come from then? Just because Ben said some shit you didn't have to jump to some stupid conclusion! How could you even think that? Like...if I'm doing something wrong you need to tell me before accusing me of something that isn't true! If I always said it back then I can't see the problem!"

"I'm sorry…"

"Will you stop it? I know you're sorry. You said it several times! And I'm sorry, too, because I was apparently a bad boyfriend if you had to question my love for you. But sorry isn't going to solve this, Blaine. I still need an explanation. Let me inside your head so I know what you were thinking!"

"You always say it back…"

"Do you not want me to say it back?"

"No. It's okay that you say it back...Just...You only say it back, okay? Like an automatic response...You never say it first…" Kurt stopped in his tracks and slumped down on the couch. He gaped at Blaine wordlessly, taking in what he'd been told.

"It didn't really bother me. It was something I noticed and mostly I ignored it. But then you started keeping things from me and I was waiting for you to tell me and you didn't. And we barely saw each other lately, and I met Ben, and then my parents told me they wouldn't come to the showcase and you cancelled our date...It was really a shitty day and I just got stuck inside my own head. I know you love me, Kurt. I don't doubt that. I swear I don't. But I wonder if you love me enough not to leave me…"

"Why would I lea-" Kurt faltered. "You know about the offer. Who told you?!"

"Santana."

"It's not...Fuck!"

"Why didn't you tell me you're leaving New York?"

"I'm not leaving yet. We don't know if we got the job."

"Kurt, of course you're gonna get it. And you'll be gone while I have to stay here. You kept it a secret so I assume there is a reason for that…"

"I wanted to make sure that I'm doing everything I can to make it easier for you. That's why I didn't tell you."

"Make it easier? So you are going to break up with me?"

"What?! No! Of course not! I was trying to come up with some plan so YOU wouldn't break up with me!"

"Why would I break up with you?"

"Because you don't believe in long distance relationships! You broke it off with Wyatt when you went in different directions. I was thinking of ways to keep you busy while I'm gone. Then Carmen told me about June and I knew if you would perform, she would choose you. Which is exactly what happened. And now you're her new project and you'll have a lot on your plate next year with school and a possible break out on Broadway so you won't have much time to miss me...And before you know it, I'll be back in the city and…"

"You thought I would break up with you?" Blaine asked in a small, barely audible voice. Kurt saw a streak of emotion playing on his face - from awe and surprise to something that almost reflected anger. Like Blaine couldn't believe he had to go through all of this because Kurt thought he would break up with him. Like he couldn't believe Kurt would ever think something like that.

"Yes...and I might not say it the way you would like - which I'm going to work on - but I love you. I love you more than anything in this world, Blaine, and I want us to be together."

"We really need to work on our communication. We can't afford misunderstandings if we want to do long distance…"

"So you will consider it?"

"I don't have to consider anything, Kurt. There is a difference between long distance when you're freshly out of high school and when you're finishing college. We'll figure something out. We'll make it work."

"No more secrets."

"No more secrets."

"And we have to tell each other if we have some doubts…"

"Yes. From now on we'll be honest about what's bothering us."

"Okay," Kurt nodded and stood up. He opened his arms and Blaine gladly allowed his boyfriend to embrace him. Blaine would miss this. Kurt's hugs made him feel safe and cared for. His familiar scent was what Blaine called home. Small kisses on his temple always helped him relax and even though soft whispers of  _I love you_  were new, Blaine felt like the words were absolutely unnecessary because Kurt showed him how much he loved him every day - through small things, big gestures, through touches or kisses, through his expressive eyes and the smile that was reserved just for Blaine. And Blaine clung to him, promising that he would never doubt his love ever again. If he had to make a choice, he would choose Kurt's actions of love and adoration over the three little words anytime. He swore to himself he would never be this stupid again. Blaine owned Kurt's heart as much as Kurt owned his, and he would make sure their hearts would stay safe in each others hands.


End file.
